Lucky For Me - More Reviews!

I'm excited to report that my book, Lucky For Me - A Journey of Healing and Self-discovery, has had the great fortune of receiving some more wonderful reviews!!  

I personally like to read reviews before I make any kind of purchase - whether it's a product or a service. Hearing what other people's experience has been (not just what the author, service provider or product manufacturer says), gives me much more insight into whether or not something is a fit for ME. In case any of you are like me, I decided it might be helpful to share the recent reviews here.  :-)  

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Maureen Burkley has written a book that any dog lover will find engaging, instructive, and transformational. Her experiences gained from adopting an abused and traumatized puppy greatly illuminate the canine/human relationship. And in doing so, illustrates the profound connection and exchange of learning what is possible between a person and any living creature. 

Maureen’s journey with her German Shepherd, Lucky shows how approaching a challenging task with self-awareness and openness leads to profound discovery and healing growth. The story presents a lesson in compassion while revealing insights and training methods that made me a more loving and responsible dog parent and gave me clues about my own mental-emotional patterns. As a specialist in Emotional Intelligence, I found the book to be a consistent primer threaded with behavioral practices and keys to personal awareness that span the spectrum of relationships. Curiosity, openness, and compassion open us to deeper connections and reveal new paths. And it’s just a great dog story!

 

Steve Whiteford – Applied Emotional Intelligence Consultant 

and

It has been a long time since I resonated with and was moved by a book. “Lucky For Me” resonated with me and I was definitely moved by it. As a longtime dog lover and parent, I truly believe that dogs have souls. It is truly a gift to have a special emotional connection with an animal. They save us and we save them. Thank you for saving Lucky and I am glad she was able to help save you as well.

K.C.

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And for those of you who may have missed previous reviews, here are a couple more: 

Like the boy on an expedition who seeks wisdom by attending to omens in The Alchemist, author Maureen Burkley listens intently to signs she receives from Lucky, her adopted German Shepherd. What she learns couldn’t help but propel her on a quest for personal healing and self-discovery. 

Searching to understand the root causes of Lucky’s illnesses, Maureen gingerly and lovingly assists her companion in overcoming deep-seated traumas. Through the unraveling of Lucky’s knotted wounds, Maureen shows us how we can be alchemists of our own pain and transform whatever shackles us from being our best selves. 

Lucky For Me is an intimate portrait of two friends who discover when one of us evolves, everything around us evolves. The hard-earned lessons Maureen imparts throughout her story are poignant and timely, told with extraordinary honesty and regard for the reader. This is not only a must-read for animal lovers, but for anyone who could use a reminder of the preciousness of every life.

Paula Francis – author of 18 Pair Of Shoes

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Maureen's book is so inspiring and very interesting to read. She showed so much strength and perseverance during her special journey with Lucky. There is so much of her heart and determination to help Lucky with her challenges. You truly see the power of unconditional love.  The connections Maureen made to guide her were almost unbelievable or magical since many came in strange ways and at just the right time.  

So many stories in the book that I could relate to or felt the same way at times. While reading her book it triggered many of my own memories. My favorite stories were her many fun times with Lucky. Although Lucky had some struggles she never gave up either and actually help to guide Maureen on her path. Lucky brought so much joy to so many people of all ages.  They were such gifts to each other and also to so many people, myself included.

Maureen's book taught me several things that could help me in my life as well. 

L.B.

Why Not Do It Now?

When my mother passed away, I did the eulogy and of course had to share some of the many funny memories about her. One of the big standouts was how she save things for "special occasions" instead of using them and enjoying them in the present. 

This topic had come up many years earlier when she was very ill and in the hospital for weeks, while the doctors tried to figure out what was going on with her body. It was a scary time for all of us because we knew there was a chance that she wouldn't pull through. My brother flew into town - it was really serious. 

Fortunately, my mom eventually DID pull through so on the day she was finally being released from the hospital, I put together a "coming home bag" with comfortable but clean clothing for her to wear home. I assumed she would be happy that I took the time to do that for her. Instead I got chastised for bringing her "good underwear" as apparently, she was saving it.  LOL  

We teased her endlessly about it because her definition of "good underwear" was a little surprising to all of us. It was a pair of Jockey cotton briefs, just like all the other ones. The exception was that this particular pair had pretty fall colored leaves on them (my mom loved fall leaves) instead of being a solid color like the rest of them. Regardless of the pretty leaves, we couldn't stop teasing her about what could qualify as a "special occasion" if recovering and being able to leave the hospital wasn't special enough. 

That weekend, we had a celebratory feast to honor her and her return home. Us kids did all the cooking so that my mom could just rest (which proved to be quite difficult for her  - we had to keep shooing her out of the kitchen) haha  My brother set a beautiful table with colorful linens, china plates and crystal glasses to make it match the celebratory feeling we all had that she had made it out of the hospital. Much to our surprise, when we brought mom into the dining room, the first thing she did was chastise my brother for using the "good linens" which you can probably guess by now . . . linens she was saving for a special occasion. :-) The teasing resumed as we couldn't believe she still didn't deem surviving what she had just been through as special enough to warrant the use of her best linens. 

It was something that stuck with all of us and we all vowed to enjoy things NOW and not save them for another day or a special occasion. I thought I had embraced this pretty well but last night I caught myself in a similar situation. 

While putting things into the linen closet, my hand brushed against the softest towel in the pile. I stopped for a moment, questioning how I could have a towel in there that was THAT soft and luxurious feeling. And then I started to giggle. It was the "guest towel" . . .  something else that I inadvertently learned from my mother. She had a special set of bath towels, hand towels and wash rags that we only pulled out when guests were coming. Until that moment, I didn't realize I had done the same thing. What made it even funnier to me is that I rarely have guests stay over night and when I do, it's usually a friend who stays the night but heads home after breakfast - without wanting or needing to take a shower.

At that moment, I decided that *I* was worthy of enjoying the guest towel and vowed to use it as long as I wanted to (or until it was like all the other towels in the linen closet - less fluffy and less soft). What a treat it was to get out of the shower last night and dry off with such a lovely feeling towel! 

Pondering this last night, I wondered how many other ways I had slipped into that mindset of saving something for a special occasion or a special guest. I truly believe that it is important for us to treat ourselves as well as we treat others, to not put off to tomorrow what we could be enjoying today. Making a recommitment to myself - I thanked my mom for helping me remember and I
am watching myself closely to make sure that I am savoring each day and enjoying all that I have.

Have any of you slipped into this mindset? If so, would you consider giving yourself permission to break free from it?  We are only here for so long . . . I think we all deserve to enjoy each and every moment of it. 

Lucky For Me - A Journey of Healing and Self-Discovery

It's hard to believe that it has almost been a year since my book, Lucky For Me, was published. Time certainly does seem to be flying by this year. Feedback so far has been wonderful (and a few folks have been kind enough to let me know where a typo snuck through so I can get those all fixed in the near future). :-) It has been so fun for me to hear all the different ways that people have connected with different parts of our story or insights we gained throughout our journey.

In the prologue, I mention that part of the reason that I felt so compelled to share our story was because I felt deep inside my heart that it would somehow be of assistance to others. 

I wrote: I know I am not the only person who has had an intense bond with their animal, nor am I the only one who has gone to extremes to help an animal recover from the abuse they suffered or heal their own trauma. My intention in sharing our journey is to light the path for those who find themselves with similar challenges. Whether you are someone who is extremely sensitive and feels things very deeply or you are trying to heal the past or you are in the process of self-discovery, my hope is that you'll experience some "aha" moments and points of connection through this book that can assist you on your own journey, and maybe even inspire you to find your way to a deeper understanding and appreciation of all you have to offer too. 

It is truly gratifying when I receive feedback that lets me know that the book has done what I hoped it would for some people . . . giving them their own AHA moments, seeing things in themselves and/or their relationship with their pets that they hadn't noticed before and in some cases even helping them unravel pieces of their childhood that have had more of an impact on them than they realized. 

While I trust that the book will end up in the hands of people who it can serve, I also know that it is ok to ask for support.  :-)  

The odds of me reading a book often increase dramatically if someone personally recommends it to me, especially when the person knows me well enough to know that it will speak to me and to my heart. So I welcome those of you who have read my book to recommend it to others if you feel it can be of assistance. Whether it is an animal lover / someone who has a strong bond with their pet, or a very sensitive soul, or a person trying to untangle who they are from who they thought they were "supposed" to be or someone who is on their own healing path. There are so many little nuggets in the book that others can relate to and it would make my heart happy if I knew that our story was helping even more people along their own paths. 

Maybe it would make a great holiday gift? It could possibly provide encouragement to someone you know who is struggling right now. So if you feel inspired to recommend my book to others or purchase it as a gift, I would be extremely grateful! 

Link to purchase the book: Lucky For Me - A Journey of Healing and Self-discovery

Endless gratitude for your support!

Time To Use Our Senses

I suspect I'm not the only one who has had the experience of offering advice to someone and while the words are coming out of your mouth, you realize that it was a message for you as well - that you need to hear that same advice in that moment. This happens to me a lot - whether I am speaking to a client or a friend - I believe these moments of synchronicity are there to assist us if we are paying attention.

A humorous example of this is regarding the nose games my German shepherd Kino and I play almost every day. I cut up treats into tiny pieces (smaller than a kernel of corn) and hide them around the house for him to find. The funny thing is that I can tell when he is using his brain and not his nose because he begins running to "known" locations to search (and usually runs right past the treats that are right near him). When I say, "Kino you've gotta use your nose" I can instantly see the switch in his approach. As soon as he starts sniffing again, he ends up finding them much more quickly.

Quite a few times when I have heard myself say "Kino you've gotta use your nose" I get that little zing of confirmation that the message isn't just for him - it's for me as well!  In those moments, I will stop and ask myself "Where am I using my brain instead of my senses?" I can usually identify pretty quickly where I have slipped into trying to solve something with my linear mind rather than relying on my heart and my intuition. (Funny enough, the approach is often the same . . . when I am in my head, the "search" for answers is usually a little chaotic and unfruitful, as I "run" to known sources of information, frequently missing what is right in front of me)

I'm sharing this now because I am seeing the need for us all to rely much more on our own senses. We are being bombarded with so much information and there is so much disinformation or conflicting information flying around that it is really hard somedays to discern what the truth is or determine what our best next step is. 

My hope is that this post will encourage everyone to take a deep breath and go "inside" to see what your own senses tell you. I am a big fan of the "hand on the heart" method of checking in with myself. After a couple deep breaths, it is far easier to tune into what I know and/or determine if I NEED to know something in that moment. 

Kino says he appreciates the reminder to "use his nose" so he thought we should share this to encourage everyone to tap into their own senses, their own knowing and their own internal guidance. :-)  As the information "out there" seems to get louder and louder, I'm realizing over and over again how much I can tune into myself and rely on my own inner knowledge. I feel so much gratitude for my earth-bound guide, Kino, who continues to keep me on track.

Building Trust

 Last month, I shared a post from the incredible folks at the Global Sanctuary for Elephants. The post detailed the sacred journey the elephants were navigating to process their feelings about the departure of one of the elephants at the sanctuary. 

As I mentioned in that post, my respect and appreciation for Scott and Kat who run the sanctuary is beyond words. They understand and respect animals in the same way that I do and I am often moved to tears when I read their updates. They are such an inspiration and not only do they do wonderful work on behalf of the elephants but they also are making incredible strides in educating people about the depth of animals. 

Today was one of those days so I am sharing what they wrote about the process of building trust with the elephants who are in their care.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. (and as an added bonus, I'm also including the beautiful picture of Rana) 

We have been interviewing for new caregivers at the sanctuary recently, and one of the candidates asked an interesting question that gave us a chance to reflect. She wanted to know if the elephants here at the sanctuary have a high level of trust toward Scott and Kat because the two traveled to pick them up at their old life, and bring them to Elephant Sanctuary Brazil. 

That’s an interesting theory, but the reality is that it’s more than that. While Kat may have sometimes visited elephants before transport, (with the exception of Ramba) she does not travel with the rescue caravan. Instead, she stays at the sanctuary to oversee care of the elephants already here. Though Scott does travel with the elephants to their new home at the sanctuary, there seems to be a larger element at play. 

For instance, Scott led the team that moved Lady to ESB, but Lady built up a trusting relationship with Kat first. It took longer for Lady to open up with Scott and, for whatever reason, allow herself to be vulnerable. She did not arrive with a loyalty towards him above others; if anything, she insisted he prove himself to a higher degree than anyone else. Trust does not occur with elephants only because of the hours spent with them bringing them to their new home. Part of your purpose is to facilitate a new life for them and to honor all that comes with that new life, outside of your own role. Significant trust is something that takes time, is continuously built on day after day, and can be lost at any moment.

Trust can come from things like a daily routine, or the understanding that care we offer is helping them to feel better, but the bedrock of building relationships with the elephants in our care is hearing what they communicate that they need from us - not who met whom first. Truly, respect comes when you honor the space and the life that belongs to them. It’s not about us and our egos or hangups (although it can be difficult for people to not get lost in how wonderful elephants make you feel when you are around them); it’s about what they need for us to be. Sometimes it’s most important for them to be standing on their own and finding their way in a manner that’s completely separate from their relationships with humans. Our job, as those helping to foster their healing, is to recognize and appreciate the significance of each step in their journey, regardless of what it means for us personally.

My Chat With Todd

Todd Medina is someone I have followed for years. He has a show called Soulspeaks 5D where he brings people on - in his words "to just chat." People from all over the world come on his show to share their experiences, their insights, etc. as a way of supporting others who are on a similar path. It's like a giant library of information that is shared from people's hearts and their souls - all for the purpose of assisting others who are growing and learning and trying to navigate this crazy world we are living in right now.

Initially, I was drawn to his shows because he is someone who isn't afraid to be honest, real and vulnerable - which was like music to my ears. Through his shows he gives people a platform to share their gifts and knowledge with others and he has this amazing ability to hold space for people - which allows them to step more fully into who they authentically are.

Last week, I had the absolute pleasure of getting to have one of those chats with Todd Medina on Soulspeaks 5D. In the first half of the show, we talk about my healing journey (which basically is a synopsis of my book Lucky For Me that came out earlier this year) and the second half of the show we talk about what I do and how I work with people and animals. We also discuss what I've learned from animals over the years and how our pets can play a pivotal role in our personal transformations if we are open to their guidance. 

If you are interested in listening to our chat, below I've shared the link to the show. 

If you are on a spiritual path and looking for some inspiration to "keep on keeping on" you might want to check out some of Todd's other chats, which can be found on youtube on his channel: Soulogyonestudios. 

For those of you who are interested in learning more about my book Lucky For Me - a Journey of Healing and Self-discovery, I have also included a link to the publisher's website, where you can read the book summary and/or make a purchase.

Finally, if you'd like to learn more about my work with animals and people, I welcome you to check out my website, Healing Animal Truths.  (link provided below)

My chat with Todd

My book - Lucky For Me

My website

A Transition at the Elephant Sanctuary

There is a wonderful elephant sanctuary in Brazil that I follow. The couple who run the sanctuary, Scott and Kat, are some of the most beautiful souls I have ever seen. Sometimes reading their updates on the elephants and hearing about the way they are treated at the sanctuary brings tears to my eyes. Scott, Kat and their team truly understand and embody the importance of love, respect and patience with animals. I continue to be deeply touched by the way they honor and respect these beautiful creatures.

It was with great sadness that they reported today that one of the elephants at their sanctuary passed away yesterday, yet when I read about the respect, love and deep honoring between the animals in their update today, I just knew this needed to be shared. My hope is that it will help others bear witness to the depth that animals have and how much respect they are worthy of. If you follow their page on Facebook, you will likely be awed by the humility and grace that Scott and Kat exemplify. They truly embody the understanding of how animals deserve to be treated.

If you are interested in learning more about this incredible sanctuary, you can find them on Facebook at Global Sanctuary for Elephants. Their website site, which is full of incredible information about how and why they created the sanctuary, lovely information about each elephant that is there as well as ways you can support them is: https://globalelephants.org

It is with heavy hearts that we announce this morning that Pocha passed away last evening. While we don’t yet know the cause of death, a necropsy will be done shortly to help us determine what happened - though we may not have results right away.

While Pocha was in Mendoza we did, on occasion, see small signs that made us worry that she had underlying health issues, but nothing was ever diagnosed. When she and Guillermina arrived here at Elephant Sanctuary Brazil, she had had an instance where she became tired and was a little slower to eat but, after a multivitamin shot, she improved. A few days ago, we noticed that she was picky with her hay, though she was still grazing and enjoying all of the produce that she was given. After a vitamin shot last night, she looked brighter and, though still tired, had more light in her eyes. However, when we returned to check on her later in the evening, we found that she had passed.

Guillermina, who was sharing the yards near the barn with her mother, gave long rumbles to call her friends - and you could hear them rumbling back to her. Once we opened the gates for the other girls to enter, Bambi, Mara, and Rana were there waiting to be with Guille. Rana walked over to Pocha with Guillermina for a few minutes and then went back to the others. Next, Bambi walked over, but stayed at a distance, somewhat wide-eyed and looking concerned. After Bambi returned to the other girls, Mara came and stayed with Guille and Pocha. After that, one by one, the other girls returned, this time Bambi backing up to Pocha, smelling her and caressing her face. Just after midnight, they all stood on different sides of Pocha, quiet and relaxed, having one of those elephant moments that only they understand. A little before 4 am, Maia also came to be with Guillermina.

Each girl stood nearby, some longer than others, and observed Pocha’s body with respect. Elephants have an innate ability to communicate with each other in ways we will never understand and that’s what appeared to be happening among this group of herd mates. With all of our years working with elephants, we have never seen this level of herd support given to another during a passing. Their support is proving much more familial in nature than we have witnessed at sanctuary in the past and, although sad, there is also something incredibly beautiful about what is taking place.

As she is coming to understand what has happened to Pocha, Guillermina has been very gentle with her mother. She touches her and smells her and caresses her with her trunk, seeming to sense that her mother is no longer of this earth. While Guille didn’t stand completely over her mother’s body (which elephants sometimes do), she did very gently maneuver her feet over Pocha’s front legs and stayed there for a while.

Though this is a difficult time and it can be hard to process such a loss, we have gratitude toward Pocha for the love and stability she was able to provide to Guillermina for 24 years. Once the two were at sanctuary, she was able to see her daughter experience true joy and begin to build relationships with other elephants - something that might have only been a dream for Pocha. There were moments when you could see Pocha watching Guille with the other elephants, and she had the brightest look on her face. We also hold a great sense of relief that both made the journey to sanctuary before Pocha’s passing, so that Guillermina is not processing her grief alone; she now has other elephants to turn to. Perhaps Pocha had a sense that her time at sanctuary was short and encouraged Guille to branch out, enjoy life with friends, explore nature, and truly discover what life as an elephant is meant to be. 

In a few short months, she was able to remember that the world was more than just a concrete wall in front of her. In actuality, life could be big and beautiful and filled with opportunity - and she was also able to give that big life to her daughter with love and a sense of immense pride.

Another Bit of Synchronistic Magic

I had the pleasure of experiencing some more of that "synchronistic magic" connected to my book and am excited to share it with all of you in the hopes that it helps you recognize these moments when they are showing up in your life too. It was particularly magical because I wasn't seeking anything at the time - just following my inner-guidance. 

There is someone I "know" from a few on-line communities I am a part of who invited me to attend a zoom call she was putting together with a few other like-minded souls that are friends of hers.  I knew instantly I would participate. No hesitation, no questioning . . . it was an immediate yes for me. 

*This is often a component of "synchronistic magic" - when you feel the "yes" immediately, almost as if it bypasses your mind completely and you just KNOW you're in. You may also notice that you have zero expectation of what will come about as a result. You're just saying "yes!" because it feels right.

While on the call, I felt very drawn to the peaceful energy of one of the other participants. I couldn't help noticing the way she held space for everyone while others were talking. Her energy was gentle and supportive but very strong and grounded as well. I felt nudged to send her a note the next day to tell her how much I appreciated her energy. (Something I am often too shy to do.)

*This is also a common component of "synchronistic magic" - when you feel an inner nudge to do something, even if you aren't sure why. You just know it feels "right" in your heart, even if you are a little nervous to do it.

I sent her an email and after a little back and forth, I found out that she (Paula) is also an author who, like me, published her first book this year. We decided to buy a copy of each other's books - again another "immediate yes" - no "thinking" required. :-) 

I had just started another book when her book arrived so some time had passed between when I ordered/received her book and when I got started on it. After the first few chapters, I felt inspired to email her and tell her how much I was already enjoying her book. I randomly decided to mention that my delay in starting it was because there was another book that I wanted to finish reading before I started hers. 

*This is another common component when you are riding the wave of Synchronistic Magic. You observe yourself saying or writing something that you hadn't previously intended - it just kind of pops out of your mouth or springs from your fingertips. 

As I continued to soak up and savor the beauty and insights of her book, I was in awe of how many similarities there were between her book and mine AND the one I had just finished. While they are different stories and very unique in their own way, they somehow all seemed to dovetail together. It was as if they were all woven together into the same tapestry. 

Three different people, writing three completely different books from three different perspectives. One was fiction, the other two were memoirs and yet there was so much in these three books that were the same . . . insights - nuggets of wisdom, etc. The "main characters" experienced different challenges, followed different paths, the authors used different terminology to describe the journey and yet they revealed so many of the same discoveries. I was amazed by the fact we were all finding a way to share our understanding of such similar concepts.

Once she finished reading my book, she emailed me to tell me how much she enjoyed it. Excitedly I told her about how I could feel these threads of connection between her book, my book and the one that I had read right before hers. It was then that I shared what the other book was . . . 

And that was the next jaw dropping moment of the Synchronistic Magic . . . the book at the top of HER reading pile that she planned to start next was the SAME BOOK . . . . The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho. I'm telling you, you just can't make this stuff up!  This is what Paula refers to in her book as PFM's - Pure Freakin' Magic! 

*When this happens - these moments of PFM - it's extremely likely that more things will reveal themselves in surprising ways . . . connections (meeting the next right person) or ideas (a random thought pops into your head that you hadn't considered before) etc.  The key is to just stay open and see what comes next.

The more they happen, the less surprised we are when they happen and yet my giddy reaction to having experienced another one of these PFM's never lessens! They are the things that tell me I am on the right track, they are my sign posts, my encouragement to keep moving ahead, confirming that I am "in flow."

How do you know when you are having a PFM moment? You might find yourself thinking "Could this really be?" "How is this possible?" You might notice a quickening of your heart rate or notice your breathing changes (to either deeper or more shallow with each in-breath).  For me, these moments are often accompanied by a buzzing in my ears or goosebumps up my arms. Sometimes it is a smile so big it makes my eyes squint or my hands automatically swoop up and cover my heart, as I breathe it in and savor the moment. There is no "right" way to experience a PFM moment. (Just pointing out a few of the things I've noticed in myself in the hopes that it might help some of you recognize them as well)

I truly believe the energy of this magic is all around us - whether you call them synchronicities, or PFMs or any other descriptor . . . what we call them is less important than just observing them when they happen and watching them unfold. The more we see the magic and ride the waves, the more magic we will likely encounter.

So listen to your heart and your inner-nudges, notice when you find yourself saying "yes" to something that you can feel in your heart (that by-passes the thinking/processing of our mind) and then stay open to seeing what shows up next!  

Right now, I think most of us could really benefit from experiencing more magic in our lives - to lift our spirits and show us what else is possible . . . My wish for all of humanity is that these beautiful moments become more and more noticeable to everyone because I believe in my heart that we all deserve them and so much more!!!

Misunderstandings

It seems we are surrounded by so many "opportunities" for misunderstandings. I have observed time and again how upset and frustrated people can get on both sides of the coin - whether you are the person who is communicating or the person who is being communicated to. Unfortunately miscommunications can lead us to judge the people who didn't follow what we thought was a clear message. It can also lead us to judgement toward the person who communicated -  for asking people to do something that just sounds outlandish. (Of course, misunderstandings can create all sorts of unexpected twists and turns  - these are just a couple examples). Bottom line, misunderstandings can happen very easily. 

Whenever I see this meme it makes me giggle so much. At the same time it articulates this point so perfectly!  So often we think we are being super clear when in fact what we are saying is as confusing as this sign! 

Sometimes all that is needed is to repeat what we "heard" and ask from a place of curiosity if we have received the message as intended. We could say something like "I want to make sure I've got this right - you want me to do "x?" and upon hearing how we received the message, the person communicating the message has the opportunity to hear how their message was received and if appropriate re-clarify what they really meant to articulate.

I've found that we can usually clear up a misunderstanding rather quickly if we are willing to speak up as soon as possible. Not from a place of frustration though (or dripping in sarcasm). If we can truly come from a place of curiosity, the situation can often be resolved in a matter of minutes. Occasionally it can even lead to some shared laughter when the message giver hears how the message was received.

Something to ponder anyway. Or maybe you can just have a laugh if that's what you need today.

I don't know who created this hilarious meme so I can't give proper credit. If anyone knows who it is, please let me know so I can thank them for all the giggles it has given me! 

Don't Stop Believing in Humanity

When I was in college, I was on the rowing team. Practice was at 5am, which was brutal enough but the closer it got to finals and the later into the evening I had to study, the harder it was to get my sleep deprived body up with that morning alarm. One particular morning, I woke up to see I had less than 5 minutes to get myself dressed and to the bus stop around the corner where our team bus picked up those of us in the surrounding dorms. I don't know if I forgot to set the alarm or if I set it and slept through it - all I knew is that I had to get MOVING. I managed to get sweats on, several layers of shirts and my socks when I heard the sound of the bus down the street. 

Grabbing my jacket and my tennis shoes, I went running out of my dorm room, flying down the steps outside hoping to make it in time. Luck wasn't on my side, as the bus pulled away from the curb before I could even make it across the grass in front of my dorm. The thing was I HAD to be at practice. Coach had been very clear - if we missed a practice that week, we would not be able to participate in the Regatta that weekend - so I needed to get to practice. Running behind the bus, I screamed and wildly waved my right arm, while my left hand clutched my tennis shoes and my jacket. There was half melted snow on the ground so my wool socks were quickly becoming very wet and very heavy but I refused to let that slow me down. I just kept running . . . yet when I heard Fr. Siconolfi shift the bus into a higher gear, I could feel my heart sink. There was no way I'd catch the bus now.

Just then a man pulled up in a small blue truck. He rolled down the passenger window (which he had to do by hand - this was in the 80's after all) and yelled "Do you need to catch that bus?" Gasping for air, all I could do was nod my head yes, so he opened the door from the inside and motioned for me to get in. Diving into the front seat of his truck, we were on the move before I had even pulled the door all the way closed. He quickly shared that his sons had played football and he knew how important it was to never miss a practice. 

I'm pretty sure he ignored all the posted speed limit signs as we flew down the road, making a hard left, then a hard right at the next corner. We were then on the two-lane straight part of the road. I remember this kind man had a cup of coffee in a paper cup wedged between his legs so he could keep shift gears to keep pace with the bus and I also recall having a moment of worry that it was going to spill on him. 

Fortunately for me, he seemed as determined as I was to not have me miss practice so he did his best to stay lined up with the bus. Continuing to flail my arms wildly while yelling to get his attention, Father Siconolfi remained oblivious to the girl hanging out the window of the small blue truck. Fortunately one of my teammates, in their hazy sleep deprived state, finally noticed me and got him to pull over. Quickly thanking the man, I grabbed my tennis shoes and jacket and made a beeline for the bus. 

Over the years whenever I shared this story, hoping people would understand why I believed in the good side of humanity (and why I loved Spokane so much), most of the time they didn't get it. The part that most people latched onto was that "I got into a stranger's truck." They responded with things like "He could have been a serial killer" and "Maureen you are just way too trusting." (Geez, what if I was the serial killer? He would have been the one putting his life in danger by stopping to help me!!) LOL

I have continued to share the story though - in an attempt to illustrate my belief that there are wonderful people everywhere - people who are willing to lend a hand . . . showing up when we need them most and going the extra mile. At times we may have to pay more attention to notice these genuine acts of kindness but they are out there and they are in more places than we see reported on mainstream media. 

I have thought of the kindness of this man so many times in the last thirty some odd years and I still feel so much gratitude for his help that day. What he did for ME has inspired me over the years to keep showing up for others. Sometimes when my faith in humanity wobbles a bit, all I have to do is pull up the memory of that morning and I am instantly reconnected with the remembrance that there are people like him all over the world. 

My only regret from that morning was that I never got his name so I was not able to thank him properly or as profusely as my heart wanted to. So this post has three purposes:

1) To encourage people to look for the good in humanity. If you take the time to look, you will see examples and it will likely result in you noticing even more of the ways people are showing up for each other. (And let's face it, how can that not put a smile on your face and in your heart.)

2) To inspire people to stay open to the opportunities where they can show up for others and be the illustration of the goodness that exists in the world. You may never know how many ripples of kindness it will create yet I have seen evidence time and again where someone's act of kindness inspired someone else to do something kind. We have the power to make our humanity a force to be reckoned with.

3) That someone who lived in Spokane back in the 80s might know a man who drove a small blue truck and would have been on his way to work at 5:00 in the morning, who has sons who played football. My hope is that by some miracle he will somehow end up seeing this because it would make me so very happy if he knew how grateful I was and still am for his help that morning and how much he has inspired me over the years. The funny thing is that I don't think we even did all that well in the Regatta that weekend but I got to be there and I got to row because thanks to him I didn't miss practice that morning. 

If you feel moved to share actions - either witnessed or done by you - that have restored your faith in humanity, please feel free to write about them in the comments. I'd love to see them and I bet others would too. 

ps: I keep thinking about the movie Powder (1995) and how a line in the movie gave me such huge goosebumps that I wrote it on a post-it note and placed it on the refrigerator so I would see it every day (and it was there for decades). If I recall correctly, Jeff Goldblum's character said something like "My hope is that one day our humanity will surpass our technology." That was and still is something I hope to experience as well and I truly believe that we have the ability to create it.

Give Yourself Permission to Just Be You

From the beginning of my career, I had a bit of trouble fitting-in to the corporate world. I guess I wasn’t good at “playing the part” because I longed to be me, to be valued for who I was and what I brought to the “party.” I was also a people-pleasers so I constantly felt the push and pull between those two sides of the spectrum – feeling like no matter what choice I made, it wouldn’t be the “right” choice.

Early in my 20s, I was told I should never wear heels when I taught a workshop and that I should sit down as much as possible because at 5’11” I was apparently too intimidating. I was also told I needed to invest in wool gabardine slacks, some high neck blouses and a string of pearls. How was that going to improve the experience of the participants if I was dressed like my grandmother? Why wasn’t it ok for me to just be ME?

When I went into consulting, I was told I should wear long sleeves and pants because companies wouldn’t want to hire a consultant with a tan. Apparently having a tan would suggest I was charging too much or not working hard enough – but I had decided to be a consultant in part because having a work/life balance was really important to me. If walking on the beach or hiking on sunny trails helped me be more present and energized when I was working with clients, why should that be hidden? I found it especially confusing when these were companies claiming that a strong work/life balance was part of their culture or mission. Over the years, peers questioned my use of humor and my willingness to share my own vulnerability while I was working with clients, suggesting that it wasn’t “professional.” I saw how my approach helped my clients feel comfortable opening up and engaging more deeply in what we were doing (whether it was a class or a session I was facilitating or someone I was coaching) so I didn’t want to stop making them laugh or sharing my vulnerabilities. I didn’t want to stop bringing “me” to the table. 

 

Before I left the corporate world, I was chastised for not having glitzy enough graphics and animation in my presentations. I was told that training participants wanted to be entertained and to feel that I was relatable. Since most of my clients were in the tech world, I was told I needed to use more technology in my presentations. Yet I was less interested in the presentation portion of the workshops I taught or sessions I facilitated as I felt it was more important to get folks engaged in the material. To me, group exercises and discussions where they could really work with the material and get a sense of how to USE the concepts I was sharing once they were back at work seemed more important. Many companies were more interested in meeting their goals for the quarter, which were often about the # of employees they put through training and how many them were “happy” with the training or the # of off-site meetings the manager held. What mattered to me was what the employees were able to do AFTER the session – once they were back at work. Were they able to implement the concepts we worked with? Or were they encountering roadblocks because of broken processes and people issues that were higher up the chain? That was what I cared about yet it was where the disconnect often was. It was confusing to me when companies would spend so much money on training or off-sites but not care as much about what employees were able to do with it afterward.

 

I’m not complaining or trying to shame anyone for the unsolicited “advice” I received or the lack of alignment I felt. I’m just offering up a few examples of how sometimes it is difficult to fit into a mold or play a part that doesn’t feel totally aligned with who we truly are. Was I a fit for every client? No and I didn’t expect to be. What I did want was opportunities to work with companies and individuals who were in alignment with how I wanted to show up in the corporate world. 

 

Fortunately when I do dip my toes back into the corporate world, it is because I have found individuals and companies that accept me for me and value what I have to offer. I have met executives who really want to know what the roadblocks are to their employees being as effective as possible. I have had the great fortune of working with a few executives who jump right in and start removing those roadblocks, whether it is fixing a process or addressing a people issue that is keeping their employees from being fully empowered in their jobs.

 

So why am I sharing this? I am offering it up for folks to consider because if there is one thing I have learned as I have gotten older is that there is nothing wrong with being ourselves. I believe that WHO each of us are individually is truly our gift to the world. It is where our value lies and where our greatest and strongest contributions can be made. 

I recognize that not everyone is plagued with the same issues I was but for those who are – if you happen to be someone who is feeling the pull between being YOU and fitting in, I hope you might feel inspired to bring more of the real you to the table. I also offer encouragement to not be afraid to step outside the box and be yourself. There is a wonderful feeling of freedom that comes when we allow ourselves to drop the mold we are trying to fit ourselves into and bring more of our true selves to the table! 

The Things I Knew At Sixteen

While going through some boxes this week, I found a folder with some old school papers in it.  I had saved a couple of poems I wrote in a creative writing class, which surprised me because I never thought poetry was my thing (I only remember getting really hung up on needing everything to rhyme)  LOL 

My jaw dropped when I discovered that back in high school (umm, about 40 years ago) I was writing about things that I've pretty much spent the last 4 decades learning/re-learning. While I was tickled to see that I had a little more insight at the age of 16 than I recall, it did kind of explain why I never felt like I "fit in" when I was young. My head and my heart always seemed to be some place else - some far away place that didn't make sense to others. Thought I'd share the poems here . . . not because they are GREAT poems but because the content has a fair amount of wisdom and interestingly enough, they seem quite fitting for the times we're in. 

Inner Peace

Maybe it's that eagerness that never seems to cease, always searching high and low for that inner peace.

Unsure at times of what it is, with all of the confusion. Ringing bells and hurried schedules are offenders of intrusion.

Early morning til late night it always is the same. Everyone in such a rush, playing that competitive game.

No one taking the time to stop and smell a pretty flower. People seem to be keyed in on only gaining power.

At times I want to make the world stop for just a minute - to appreciate this world of ours and all the marvelous things in it.

Receiving is all we ever do and no one wants to give. If only we could open up, there'd be more of a reason to live.

Crowds of people everywhere and all those people need love. If only they would care some more instead of push and shove.

Anticipating a change in us, that could make us share some more, because unless this change occurs, inner peace I can never explore.

Until the day comes when we have time for each other, retentive thoughts will linger on and I won't run for cover.

Keeping in mind that inner peace is my greatest need, learning early on in life that that's what others plead.

Everything I do in life will be reaching towards a new way. Yesterday it was inner peace, now it's that everyone reaches inner peace too some day.

Windows To The World

Windows to the world are what we're looking through - though clouded windows won't always do.

Who knows if what we find is true. Always mixed with emotion, people always blue.

Seeing is believing, as some people say. Yet for those who cannot see, what is the price they pay?

Knowing is to get a better view, but what about those who never get a clue.

Touching - we are moving toward the things we feel. Remember, love isn't something we can steal.

Trying to be what we could never be. Accepting ourselves for who we are is the real key.

Turning, if we'd only open up our hearts. Making attempts but they are all false starts.

Yearning for the things we cannot see. If we could be patient, they would come to be.

For the windows to the world aren't opened all the way. If we stay open, maybe we'll understand it all some day.

Empowering Pet Parents

Clients often ask me if I can tell them why something is going on with their pet. I wish it were that simple - that I could ask a pet "What is making you so itchy?" or "Why have you been throwing up lately?" and then relay their answer to their guardian.  Since animals don't communicate that way, it is often up to us - their guardians - to answer those questions. You might be surprised to know that keeping track of changes we've made (regarding food, treats, medication/supplements as well as life changes, schedule changes, etc) will give us more information than we thought possible.

I learned this myself many years ago when all of the sudden Lucky had a ton of hot spots. She was itchy and uncomfortable all the time. My vet asked me if there had been changes to her food or treats and my answer was "No." In my mind, nothing had changed so we couldn't figure out what could have caused this sudden bout of severe itchiness. Then one day while at the pet store, I decided to grab another bag of the treats I gave her and was stunned to realize that there were two different brands right next to each other on the shelf. The shape and size of the treats were identical and the bags were even the same color. Could I had accidentally bought her a different type of treat the last time I made a purchase? Sure enough that ended up being the culprit. Here I was swearing up and down that NOTHING had changed, when the truth was, I had accidentally bought a different treat and since I opened the bag up and poured them into the "treat jar" I hadn't seen the packaging since the day I bought them.  (On the plus side, that was when we determined that Lucky had an allergic reaction to corn). 

I learned a lot in the years Lucky was with me and thankfully, I can pass those insights along to my clients. For instance, I have had countless dogs suddenly become "deaf" - my clients assume it's an old age thing but often inquire if a Reiki session could help with that. This is a situation I am so familiar with that I always ask "Did your dog have ear mites anytime in the last 6 months?" The answer is YES about 80% of the time. The reason I ask that question is because I learned through my OWN experience that the treatment (drops that you put in their ear canal) can often leave a thin coating on the ear drum. This results in the dog not being able to hear as well and in most cases, using an ear wash will "restore the dog's hearing." 

The "hearing loss" isn't usually noticed immediately so by the time we're at the "I think my dog is deaf" stage, we've long forgotten about that brief period of ear mite treatment that occurred months earlier. So much time can pass that it won't ever occur to us that the two things are related. 

As Lucky got older and had more health issues, it was harder and harder to keep track of how long something had been going on, as it seemed my answer to that was "just recently" or "for quite a while" whenever our vet asked me questions about the timing of things. That was when I learned to keep my own "Pet Journal."

Recently I had a client who was very concerned about her dog's seizures and she wanted to know if I could tell her what was causing them. I explained to her that her dog wouldn't be able to tell me the cause but reminded her that she had more knowledge than she thought she did. I suggested she start keeping a journal/diary for her dog. She said she already kept track of food changes and medication/supplement changes in her calendar so I asked her if she could also start writing down everything else she was observing. Whether it was behavioral or medical or just seemingly random small things.

So often the "answer" can lie in our ability to observe (and keep track) of seemingly unrelated or unimportant things . . . there is real "gold" there if we can take the time to jot all those details down. Things like crankiness, sleeping a little more, a random potty accident could actually line up with random things that aren't obvious at first. I also find clients change things between visits to their vet (or sessions with me) and they have trouble remembering when they stopped giving their pet a certain supplement (and why) or when certain behavioral things began happening.

It is the reason that I often suggest that animal guardians start keeping a diary for their pets (especially with all my older pets) because a) it's nearly impossible to remember every detail or know what details are important and which ones aren't. and b) because animals often "show us" what's going on through these seemingly small and/or unrelated things. Yes, it does mean that I talk about 50% of the people who come to me for a session OUT of having a session - LOL - but I would much rather support people in finding the answers themselves whenever possible.  

And I love getting their updates when they have figured something out on their own. From the dog who was having issues with itchiness (Her mom determined it was the laundry detergent she was using to wash her dog's bedding and hadn't previously noticed that the itching got worse every time she "washed all the dog bed covers") to the client whose dog had "random potty accidents" who determined that they actually occurred on the day she returned from a business trip). The animal guardians I work with are becoming more and more empowered to find important information this way. Always remember: you have more knowledge of what is happening with your pet than you realize!! 

The other reason this type of information can be helpful is when I DO have a session with an animal, I am able to tap in more specifically to what the guardian has been able to put together. Partnering WITH the guardian almost always ensures a better and/or quicker resolution. 

For example, when a guardian needed help with her cat who had suddenly started vomiting . . . since she was able to tell me exactly what her cat, who was on a raw food diet, was eating for breakfast each day, I was able to pick up on the fact that it was too many different proteins. Plus I got a feeling of queasiness that I get when I eat food that is too rich. Based on that she decided to cut back on the # of different proteins each day and also cut out the ones that were a little more rich. Kitty barfing was resolved!!! 

With another client, being able to share specifics from his journal about when his dog jumped the fence and how often it happened along with what other things were occurring in his life at the time, helped us determine that it WASN'T a negative reaction to his new girlfriend (his biggest fear), but instead the fence jumping coincided with his son's visits. Each time his son came for a visit and then went back to college, there was a day or two of fence jumping. His dog was just missing his son. Putting a t-shirt or sweatshirt his son had worn in the dog's bed resolved the fence jumping. 

Like I said, you have more information than you think . . . and you probably need an animal communicator less often than you think too!  :-)  Something to consider . . . 

Feedback on Lucky For Me

One of the things that has been really fun for me since I published my book is hearing people's reactions to it. Of course the first round of sales were all people who are friends of mine so it wasn't a surprise that I was hearing nice comments from people - LOL - yet it didn't lessen my enjoyment one bit. Some friends emailed every 75 pages or so to tell me what they were enjoying about it so far - other friends waited until they finished reading it to tell me what grabbed their attention - either way, it was incredibly fun to hear their reactions. 

The book did what I hoped it would do . . . give people things they could connect to. Comments as seemly small as "Oh wow, I thought I was the only one who was afraid of driving on steep hills in San Francisco" to larger ones like "Oh wow, this brings back so many memories of when my pet and I went through something similar." Many people said the book gave them things to think about or that they could see something in their own life from a different perspective. It has opened the door for some really nice conversations. Several of my friends are former clients - they were clients in the years the book was written about and after their pets transitioned, they became friends . . . so their comments often included things like "I knew about some of that but not all of what was going on at the time." Ultimately they felt inspired to know how much Lucky and I were able to overcome. It was also really touching to see how many people said they felt nudged to look more closely at something they had been glossing over in their own life. 

I love hearing about what people's favorite parts of the book were, as they were often the favorite parts of my life at the time, so I was glad I was able to capture those things in the book. Many people have commented on how proud they are of me for putting myself in there (and out there) - allowing myself to be THAT honest and vulnerable - to which I confess that it was probably the hardest part of writing the book . . . making peace with the level of openness I went with and the judgement that may come along as a result. 

Of course there is a whole lot that happened in our life that didn't get included in the final version - lots of stories that didn't make it into the final draft because let's be honest - who wants to read a 900 page book? I had a few friends tease me when it first got published, saying things like "I better be in there, you know I was a big part of Lucky's life!" :-)  So Steve, here's a big shout-out to you . . . even though stories about all the time we spent with you didn't make it into the book, your friendship will always mean the world to me. Not only were you always willing to throw the ball for Lucky, whether we were hanging out at my house or out at the pool but clearly, you didn't mind joining in the ball catching on occasion either, which still makes me giggle.  LOL

I hope that my book is as well received with the people who don't know me as well (or at all) . . . only time will tell but in the meantime, I got my first written review and I'm excited to share it here:

Maureen's book is so inspiring and very interesting to read. She showed so much strength and perseverance during her special journey with Lucky. There is so much of her heart and determination to help Lucky with her challenges. You truly see the power of unconditional love.  The connections Maureen made to guide her were almost unbelievable or magical since many came in strange ways and at just the right time.  

So many stories in the book that I could relate to or felt the same way at times. While reading her book it triggered many of my own memories. My favorite stories were her many fun times with Lucky. Although Lucky had some struggles she never gave up either and actually help to guide Maureen on her path. Lucky brought so much joy to so many people of all ages.  They were such gifts to each other and also to so many people, myself included.

Maureen's book taught me several things that could help me in my life as well. 

Cleaning House with a German Shepherd . . .

Not too long ago, I saw a meme that said "Cleaning house with a German shepherd is like brushing your teeth while you are eating an Oreo cookie."  I think about that meme every time I attempt to clean house and it still makes me giggle. 

For whatever reason, Kino loves it when I clean house. I have no idea why it makes him so happy - I just know that if I clean house or work in the yard, it is truly the most animated my boy ever is. His favorite "cleaning tools" for inside are the hand-held vacuum and the swiffer duster.  

For most people, changing the sheets on the bed is a pretty quick activity . . . strip the bed, throw the sheets in the washer, then the dryer, then remake the bed. With a German shepherd like Kino, there can be a LOT more steps involved. From the moment I announce that I am going to change the sheets, the glee begins. He grabs a stuffed toy and shakes it wildly for a good 5 minutes while he runs up and down the hall over and over again. With an extra furry shepherd like Kino, that means more flying fur is generated and there is at least twice as much fur to clean up than there was before I started.

I begin the process of changing the sheets by using the hand-vac to vacuum all around the perimeter of the bed so that the blankets and comforter don't get covered in dog hair when I pull them off the bed. Since the big area rug under the bottom of the bed requires extra attention and special tools, this particular task can take quite a bit of time. Once all of that vacuuming is done and the blankets and top sheet are stripped off the bed, the hand-vac needs to be used again to get all the dog hair from inside the bed that I apparently bring back to bed with me each time I get up to use the restroom in the middle of the night. Then as I am pulling the fitted sheet off, I often look down to find that he has shed MORE fur all over the floor - which means more vacuuming will be necessary if I want to see any evidence of my effort to rid my room of excess fur.

The entire time I am in the bedroom, the melee continues. Sometimes he replaces the stuffed toy for a chew bone or a rope but there is always something in his mouth as he runs in and out of the room, up and down the hall, making his excited bark-howl noise that sometimes sounds like a wolf who is singing . . . all the while, shedding more fur that will need to be vacuumed up.  His glee-filled activity continues until I have successfully wrangled the bed sheets and put them in the washer.

Like the meme said, "Cleaning house with a German shepherd is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreo cookies"

Kino also likes it when I dust. This became a "thing" in the last couple of years, when he would bug me to get off the computer. Once I'd finally comply with his wishes and get down on the floor with him to play, he'd promptly leave the room and stand in the kitchen. I'd check his water bowl to make sure he had water, I'd check the clock to make sure it wasn't meal time, I'd offer to take him in the yard to go potty. The whole time he would just stand there and stare at me.

Dumbfounded by this odd behavior, I began saying, "Show me what you need" and he kept going to the secret door in the kitchen that is just deep enough to house the ironing board and the swiffer duster. The first time he did it, I just looked at him like he was nuts and got back on the computer but when he kept doing it, I knew it needed to be explored more. 

Now I know he wasn't asking me to iron because I don't think he even knows what an ironing board is. We haven't used it in years. (Let's be real, who irons their pajamas? And truth be told, I haven't worn much else the last couple of years). So one day I said "You want me to dust?" and that's when the excitement began. He ran into the family room to grab a stuffed toy, biting down on it repeatedly so the squeaker was activated over and over again, all the while making laps around the couch and coffee table, then back into the kitchen, then more laps around the couch and coffee table while doing some kind of happy dance. It's truly the most hilarious thing you've ever seen. Of course, this behavior also includes the shedding of more fur, the generation of more dust and extra slobber that will now need to be cleaned up as well. 

Did I mention that cleaning house with a German shepherd is like brushing your teeth while you're eating Oreos?  LOL 

Once I begin dusting, he settles in the family room with a chew bone and happily chews away while I dust that room. Each time I move to a new room, there's another round of running up and down the hall, almost like he's making sure I'm REALLY dusting in each room I enter and then celebrating the fact that we're still dusting. Some weeks, he wants me to dust three or more times - which seems a little excessive if you ask me. (Even my mom, who had some pretty stringent house-cleaning practices, only dusted once a week). The hilarious thing is that I do it - maybe in part because seeing me dust brings him so much joy - and it's really hard not to be happy yourself when you see and feel that much joy coming from someone else. 

Yet, with all that vacuuming and dusting, I swear it doesn't look like I do much of either of those things. When friends come over, I usually tell them as they walk in the door, "I swear, I just vacuumed yesterday." Fortunately, my friends don't seem to mind . . . I think they've come to realize that cleaning house with a German shepherd truly is like brushing your teeth while you're eating Oreo cookies.