Animals are our teachers

Many times, the animals that come into our lives will show us what we need to work on in our human relationships.  It is as if they are giving us a safe place to work out an issue we need to address and if we can we can work out the issue with our animal, then we can begin to apply those learnings to the other people in our lives.

One of my clients has several cats who were testing the limits with her and in need of some boundaries.  They needed to be told what was ok and what wasn't ok, and they needed her to be consistent.  As I explained to the guardian what they cats needed in the way of boundaries, she shook her head and laughed a little under her breath.  I asked her what was going on and she said "Well, if setting boundaries was easy for me, I'd be doing it with everyone else in my life."  

As we continued to talk, she shared with me how difficult it was for her to set boundaries and how frustrated she felt that the people in her life took advantage of her.  She said she often felt like a doormat but she felt powerless to change the dynamic.

I encouraged her to try first with the cats because I sensed that was part of the their purpose in her life and I knew they would be patient and understanding as she developed this new skill. 

She was willing to try and I give her a tremendous amount of credit because it wasn't easy at first.  She would set a boundary with the cats and then that old tape would start playing in her head, telling her it wasn't ok for her to ask for what she wanted and if she set limits, she was somehow being unkind to others.  She hung in there though and kept at it.  Within a few weeks, the behaviors we were trying to change with the cats did begin to change, for the better.  She started to feel empowered and began embracing the idea that it truly was ok for her to say "this is not ok" to someone.  

Over the weeks that followed, she began trying to set boundaries with family members.  The old tape still attempted to play in her head, but she had a recent success to draw from and she knew that even though she set boundaries with her cats, they still loved her and respected her, so she stayed in a place of confidence.  Her relationships with her family members have started to improve.  

If you have a pet, take a look at what your challenges are with that pet and then ask yourself if you have that same problem with people in your life.   If so, your pet may be offering you an opportunity to develop a new skill, so that you can improve all the relationships in your life.  Animals enjoy being our teachers, they like helping us become better versions of ourselves, so don't be afraid to practice first with your animals.  They will be happy they were able to help you and you might be amazed at how other relationships in your life can become more fulfilling.