What Do YOU Think?

I've noticed a theme lately with quite a few of my clients and I figured if it has come up for so many of them, maybe there are others out there who are struggling with the same thing.  It is the issue of listening to other people's thoughts and opinions to the point where we can no longer hear ourselves and our own inner voice.

You know the old saying "Too many cooks spoil the stew?" Well along those lines "Too many opinions muddy our inner voice/intuition."

I don't believe most people intentionally put more weight on other people's opinions than their own, it's just that other people's opinions can make us second guess our own knowing and cloud what is true for ourselves.

I have one client who really disliked her job and knew it was not a fit for her. She was starting to play with alternative means of income, tapping into what would truly make her happy but the more she spoke about it with friends and family, the more resigned she felt to stay in the job she was so unhappy in.  When we began to unravel what had moved her from "ready to leave" to "resigned to stay" she realized that each person's opinion further dampened her own inner voice.  When I pointed out that people speak from their own fears/concerns/history, she could see why so many people had told her a steady income was more important than how much she enjoyed what she did for a living.

Another person had experienced a physical assault and was ready to press charges but a few days later had decided against it.  When I asked her to help me understand what had changed, it was clear it was the opinions of others that had made her feel less clear about she wanted to do, even to the point of invalidating the severity of what she had experienced.

Since people come from their own fears/concerns/history when they dispense advice, what they are saying may be true for them but it is likely not going to be true for someone else.

The key to tapping into our inner guidance/intuition comes from learning to truly listening to ourselves.  Asking ourselves questions such as "What do I need?" and "How would that make me feel?" can help us connect to ourselves. The more we listen to ourselves, the easier it is to keep other people's opinions from drowning out our own knowing.

I'm not saying that we should not talk to friends and family about decisions we are trying to make.  I am merely suggesting that we don't take other people's opinions on as if they are "truth" - we don't have to embody every opinion that we hear.  If we can remain objective when we listen to people and leave their opinions "on the table" rather than putting their opinions in our pocket, so to speak, we have a greater chance to retaining the clarity of our own inner knowing.

If you are feeling stuck regarding a decision you are trying to make, it might help to stop and consider who all you've been talking to.  Are other people's opinions clouding your ability to hear your own inner voice?  Remember that it's ok to hear what other people have to say as long as you remember that their advice comes from their perspective and the only person who truly knows what is right for you is YOU.