Another Set Back

Just when I thought we were making some headway on getting Kino healthy again, we had another set back.  After all we went through a year ago dealing with his food allergies and finally finding something he could eat, it appears that he has developed an allergy to the limited ingredient food I have been making him.  To say this was disappointing is an understatement.

The other day I was sitting at the dining table, with my head in my hands . . . I could feel the fear swirling up inside of me and the feeling of hopelessness.  I know it's not a place I want to "sit" - not only because it's uncomfortable and unproductive to sit in fear and hopelessness - but because I know that if I stay in that place, I will draw in more experiences that match that vibration.  I was sitting there pondering all of that and trying to determine how I was going to shift my attention, and therefore my vibration, to something else when Kino walked into the room.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him sit in front of the sliding glass door as he keenly focused on something in the yard.  I finally looked over to see what he was looking at and much to my surprised there were 3-4 birds walking around the yard, a couple feet away from the sliding glass door.

I couldn't believe my eyes for a minute . . . Kino was WATCHING the birds.  He wasn't barking and throwing himself at the door the way he did when he first came to live with me.  He wasn't coming unglued because "something was in his yard!"  He was just watching them.  In that moment, I felt like my request had been granted.  Something positive for me to think about instead.  Wow - my boy really has come a long way.  I hugged him and thanked him for helping me shift out of the mindset I had been in.

Later that day, he gave me another one of those little "gifts" when we were out for a walk.  We were walking down the street when out of the blue a cat walked across the street in front of us.  Kino's ears perked up and I felt his body get a little rigid so I said "Kino, leave it" and while he didn't look at me immediately like he's supposed to, his body did relax.  I laughed to myself as I thought about the "old Kino" . . . I'll never forget one of our first walks after he came out of the shelter . . .  he saw a cat and the most frightening sound erupted from him . . . a combination of a howl and bark that was so loud and so manic, he sounded like he had just been gravely injured.  The sound continued as he added in lunging and odd body convulsions.  That was how Kino used to respond to seeing a cat and I took a moment to feel very very grateful that those days are behind us.  :-)

Thanks to Kino, I had a couple examples of how to shift my thinking and therefore my energy.  Since then it has been much easier to move myself out of the fear when it comes up.  Kino is still sick and I still haven't figured out what to do to help him get better but with his assistance, I'm having an easier time finding things to be grateful for.