The Nuances of Communication

Often times, people think that when I say I can communicate with animals that it is an actual "conversation" like it would be with another human. When a guardian says, "Can you find out why my dog does X?" they might assume that I can say, "Hey pup, why do you do X"" and the pup will reply, "Oh I do that because of Y and Z"  LOL  I wish it were that straight-forward.

The truth is "communication" isn't like that with animals and there is a lot of interpretation required. Sure, sometimes I get words or phrases but usually it is a mixture of their physical sensations and emotions that I sense in my body and pictures/images that come into my mind. Then the detective work begins. I sit with what I have picked up and try to piece it all together to make sense of what the animal is telling me. Given that my interpretation may not be accurate, often the assistance of the guardian is required to verify what I picked up from their animal.

One humorous example of this was the time a client wanted me to do a distance healing session on their cat who had been sick. The guardians were two sisters that lived together and while the information on the tummy issues they were concerned about came through pretty clearly, there was something else their cat was trying to tell me that I couldn't quite make sense of.

I could feel the cat was a bit irritated, I could also feel a bit of jealousy. It seemed like it had to do with a male. I sensed there had been changes to the routines she had grown accustomed to and that she also felt she was not getting as much attention. Based on the emotions I felt in their cat and the images I was getting, my best guess was that maybe one of the sisters had started dating someone new and their cat was showing me the ways she was having trouble adjusting to it.

After the session, I shared all I had learned from their cat in an email. I said that while I didn't want them to feel obligated to divulge information about their personal lives, and I certainly wasn't trying to pry, I wasn't sure if I was on track with how I had interpreted the irritation/jealousy and wondered if they could let me know.

Once they stopped laughing, they wrote me back and told me that neither of them were in a new romantic relationship, yet my email still made perfect sense to them. They had recently adopted a new kitten, a male kitten. Given that the new kitten WAS pulling their attention away and that his presence in the house had changed some of their usual routines, they were certain that was what she was trying to tell me.

Sometimes I wish communicating with animals could be more "conversational" yet I am still happy to be able to receive the information that I DO receive.

Occasionally I get a full sentence from an animal and even then it's necessary to "fill in the blanks."  Just last week, I was sitting in the yard writing while Kino was inside the house. The neighbors dogs started barking, which they do a LOT. When they play with each other, they bark the entire time and many days they get "play time" multiple times a day. It's something I struggle with because loud barking is very jarring to my nervous system.

On this particular day, I heard "It's not fair" in my head. I looked around the yard to see if there were any birds or squirrels around who might have said it but I didn't see any. Who thought something was unfair? Could it be my neighbor's dogs? and then it clicked . . . it was Kino.

I ask him all the time to please not bark. He knows it drives me crazy and yet there are days when he can't stop himself from "notifying me" that a UPS truck is driving by or that someone is walking by our house or that a leaf just fell. On those days, where he is barking his notifications non-stop, he often gets scolded by me and I have even gone so far as to tell him that I only want to hear him bark if someone is attempting to break into the house. (smile)  What I was sensing in that moment was that he felt it was unfair that they get to bark all the time, when he is repeatedly asked not to.

I had to fight back a giggle as I went inside to talk to him. Telling him that I understood why he felt it was unfair, I explained that different people have different "house rules" and reminded him that he happened to live with someone who was very sensitive to noise. I said that maybe they had different "house rules" over there and I was sorry if he felt he was being stifled. I suggested that maybe he could do some barking when I was away from the house.

The next day, as I pulled the car out of the garage, I could hear him barking inside the house. I couldn't help but laugh.  I drove a couple houses down and stopped to see if he was still barking. Much to my delight, the barking had ceased. I guess he just needed to get some of it out of his system.

Maybe someday our communication with animals will be as straight-forward as it is between humans, where you ask a question and you hear a clear answer. I think that would be very cool. In the meantime, my "interpretation muscle" will continue to get a good work-out.

Asking Permission is Appreciated

Last night I had the most pleasant dream, I woke up smiling and every time I think about the dream, it continues to make me happy.  I'm one of those people who dream a lot but my dreams, when I remember them, are not usually what I would categorize as fun or pleasant.  They are intense and weird at best and are often disturbing and unsettling.  So I was pretty excited to wake up from a dream that was so enjoyable.

In the dream, I was swimming with dolphins and then one of the dolphins asked, "Can I kiss you?" and I said "Sure!" and the sweet dolphin kissed me on the cheek.  The strange thing was that the dolphin was talking out loud so it wasn't just me who heard the question but the other people who were with me heard it as well.  The dolphins brought us back to the dock where other people were waiting for us and when the dolphins said goodbye, again, it was out loud so everyone could hear it.

Then the dream flipped to a new scene and I was sitting on the floor of a room and a bunch of raccoons were there.  At one point, one of the raccoons came up to me, stood on his hind legs and said, "Can I hug you?" and I smiled and said "Of course you can!" and he proceeded to put his arms around my neck and give me the nicest hug.  Once again, he was talking out loud and all the other people in the room could hear him talking.

When I woke up, my first thought was "Wow, that was so sweet!" and then my mind wandered into that "I wonder why I dreamt about that" territory.  There seemed to be a theme of them asking for permission before they touched me so I pondered that for a moment. Then a flash of insight came . . . animals like to be asked for permission before we touch them.

It is something that I sensed early on and I have tried to always be respectful in my interactions with animals but when I first began fostering Kino, he reinforced the importance of this in a big way.  If you reached out to touch him, he would try to bite you so I learned very quickly that I needed to always ask before touching him.  I also learned that I needed to honor his choice if he didn't want to be touched.

For instance, he has had ear infections off and on over the last 6 years and I always say, "Can I look in your ear?"  To this day, sometimes the answer is still "no" which he indicates either by running away from me or grabbing a toy and shaking it violently.  Sometimes if I explain why I want to look in his ear and assure him that "looking isn't going to hurt" he will allow it but not always.  I know it is important to respect his wishes so I never push beyond that.

As I contemplated this over my coffee this morning, I realized that he ingrained this in me quite strongly.  When he isn't feeling well, I will often say, "Do you need a hug?" and I wait to see if his tail wags.  If his tail doesn't move, I said "Ok, maybe another time." If his tail DOES wag, I give him a nice warm embrace, which usually makes his tail wag even more.  The important thing is that I let the choice be his.

I am still not 100% sure why I was treated to such a fun dream last night. My only thought is that the message was about mutual respect and how asking permission before touching is an important part of it, regardless of whether we are the human or the animal.  What I am 100% sure of is that talking to animals out loud and receiving loving gestures from them was the coolest dream I ever had.  I hope that it happens again!