Feel What You Feel. Then Let It Go

I have had several clients express concern lately that they can't stay in the emotion of love.  For as much as they try to feel love toward their co-workers, their fellow commuters, their neighbors, etc. they still have moments where they feel angry or hurt, agitated or taken advantage of.  The truth is there is nothing wrong with feeling those lower vibrating energies so we ought to stop beating ourselves up over having them.

I believe that when something triggers us and we feel angry or hurt, etc. it is not a sign that we are failing - instead it is a sign that the emotion (and the related baggage) is coming up to be released.  If we can allow ourselves to just feel what we feel and then consciously choose to let it go, we can shift ourselves back into love.  Unfortunately, we often remain stuck in the negative emotion that came up, which just prolongs our discomfort.

An example of that is if someone cuts us off in traffic and we have to slam on our brakes to avoid rear-ending them.  We may feel a surge of anger come up.  There is nothing wrong with that.  We may offer some hand gestures and swear for a few minutes.  That's OK too . . . as long as we don't stay in the emotion of anger.  If we continue to be angry, if we choose to tailgate the person the whole rest of the drive, if we post about it on social media after we get home and rant to our spouse about it for hours that evening, if we get to work the next morning and recount the story about the jerk driver to our co-workers . . . well then we are just hurting ourselves.

As an alternative, what if you allowed yourself to feel whatever you felt in that moment . . . maybe it was initially anger but as you sit with the emotion you realize you also felt fear . . . fear for your safety, fear of all the negative ramifications of a car accidents, etc.  As you continue to focus on your feelings, you may identify other ones that come up . . . maybe you feel sadness and grief as you recall a friend who died in a car accident many years ago.

Once you have allowed yourself to recognize what you feel and actually feel what you feel, then you can make the choice to release the emotion.  You can exhale deeply with the intention of letting the emotion go.  You can say "See you later" if you want or "There's some old stuff that's leaving."  You can do it any way you'd like - the key is to be conscious of your choice to release it.

After that, sometimes the higher vibration feelings like love and gratitude will just come back in on their own.  Maybe a while later, you find yourself feeling grateful that it didn't result in an accident and grateful that no one was hurt.  You might even feel compassion for the other driver and hope that whatever had them in such a rush wasn't something awful like a family tragedy.

The important thing is to be mindful about our emotions when they come up.  Rather than judging ourselves as bad for feeling angry, how about it we instead look at it as an opportunity to release something we no longer need.  We can choose how long as stay in the emotion and if we are really being kind to ourselves, we don't allow ourselves to stay in the lower vibrating emotions too long.

Next time you find yourself reacting emotionally, try out the method of really feeling it and then releasing it and see what you notice.  Sometimes we need to get a good nights sleep before things fully shift out so if you don't feel immediately lighter, don't worry about it.  See how you feel in the morning.

The important thing is to remember we have a choice about how long we stay in a negative (low vibrating) emotion and that often times when a negative emotion lingers it is because it is waiting for us to sit with it, fully feel it and consciously release it.

What The World Needs Now . . .

In many ways, we are living in challenging times.  Things happening in our world can make us question humanity, they can make us operate out of fear and they can make us feel powerless.

Yet, I believe we hold the power to make a positive difference in the world with the simple act of kindness.  If we look for opportunities every day to show people a little kindness, I believe that kindness will multiply and multiply.  It doesn't matter if you know the people you are offering kindness to or if they are strangers.  Something as simple as holding the door open for someone, or letting someone into the congested traffic lane you are in can make a big difference in someone's day. It may inspire them to offer a similar kindness to someone else and the ripple effect can take it from there.

There's a song from my childhood that plays in my head all the time . . . even though it was written and performed many years ago, the lyrics couldn't be more poignant today:

What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It's the only thing that there's just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
No not just for some but for everyone

Even though it may not feel like it, this is our world . . . and even though it may not feel like it, we have the ability to make it a better place to be.

I encourage you to try it out.  Do something kind for someone and see how they react.  Notice how it makes you feel.  Then do it again!  There's no time like the present to offer love and kindness to others.  I can't explain how it will shift things in our world, yet I am equally sure that it will.