Animals helping humans

I was fortunate enough this week to witness several more of my animal clients trying to "help" their guardians and it is such a sweet reminder of what I know about animals. I have always believed that they come into our lives to help us, not the other way around, so when I get to see more evidence of this, it warms my heart. Animals come into our lives to be our guides, to help us learn and grow and become better versions of ourselves. And they often do it without much gratitude. One of my favorite parts of the work I do is to shine a light on this "truth" about animals so that not only can the guardian learn what their animal is trying to show them but also so that the animals can get the credit they deserve.

Often times an animal will act in a way they want their guardians to learn to act. I had two clients this week whose animals were being very pushy to get what they wanted. It was a behavior that was frustrating the guardians but after some conversation and exploration, I could see that in both cases, the guardian was having a difficult time asking for what THEY wanted from their family, friends or co-workers. It's as if the animal is saying "Look, this is how you do it!" I have learned that they will keep doing whatever that is until they can get their guardians attention.

When I am able to articulate what the animal is trying to show their guardian, it's as if they are saying "Yes, that's what I have been trying to show her, thank you so much for making sure she heard me!" Some animals will lean forward and press their forehead against mine to show their appreciation, some will lick my hands or face. Whatever way they express it, their gratitude is very obvious and very beautiful.

Sometimes, the animal helping a person isn't their pet, but a random animal that they encounter, often a wild animal. I had two experiences this week where people had odd encounters with animals that were not their pets. I have this wonderful book called "Animal Speak" by Ted Andrews that I turn to whenever someone has an encounter with an animal. The book explains what the meaning is when various animals "show up" in your life because they really do have a purpose when they cross our path. They are showing up to teach us something or guide us, or give us a warning.

I have one client who had an opossum sneaking into her house. At first she was very upset about it. It was rather scary to her to encounter the opossum several nights in a row and she couldn't figure out how the opossum was getting into her house. I told her about my Animal Speak book and asked her if I could email her some information from the book about what it means when an opossum appears in your life. She said that was fine, but I sensed she wasn't too excited about my idea that maybe the opossum had a purpose, other than terrorizing she and her cats. I was pleasantly surprised to see her response to the email I sent, where she said the equivalent of "Holy cow, all of that is right on the money!" Opossums are often providing a warning and everything that I had pulled from the book related 100% to a work situation she was dealing with and she took the warning/guidance to heart. Interestingly, once she 'got it' (i.e. got the message the opossum was trying to give her), the opossum stopped sneaking into her house. He hasn't shown up since the night I shared the information from the Animal Speak book.

I had another friend who in casual conversation was telling me how he and his wife kept encountering badgers when they were out walking. He said they kept catching his attention because they made their presence known but didn't do anything to frighten them. I asked him if I could read him some things about badgers from my Animal Speak book and while he said "yes" I could sense a "whatever" under the surface. Well, after reading some excerpts from the book to him, there was silence for a minute and then he said "All the hair is standing up on my arms right now." Things I had read him from the book hit home for some things he and his wife are currently dealing with. His next questions was "Where can I get a copy of that book?"

I hope you'll start paying more attention to the animals that cross your path and the behaviors of the animals you share your home with. I really believe they are trying to teach you something if you are willing to listen.

I had my own experience this week, when a squirrel sat on my fence and kept staring at me, fluffing his tail. I smiled and said "Hi" to him but he didn't budge. He kept staring at me, kept fluffing his tail. I stood up from the chair I was sitting in and normally that will cause a squirrel to high-tail it out of my yard but he sat perfectly still, continuing to look at me. I said to him "Are you trying to tell me something?" and he kept fluffing his tail. This continued for over five minutes and I wondered how long it would go on, but I didn't want to be disrespectful and just go back into the house so I continued to watch him and talk to him.

I told him that if he was trying to tell me something, I was very sorry but I wasn't picking it up. After some time, he finally started to walk along the fence but he kept turning around looking at me every few feet. I thanked him for stopping for a visit and once he was at the end of my fence, I went inside and pulled out my Animal Speak book. The line that caught my eye in the squirrel section was about how squirrels play as hard as they work and that often when a squirrel shows up, its to make us look at ourselves and whether we are not playing enough.

It hit home with me because "playing" is not something I have done much lately, with Lucky's health being what it is and the challenges that have come with caring for her. In fact, earlier that day, I had been feeling a little stressed about the fact that my most favorite band in the whole world, the subdudes, were going to be in town for two nights this week. I have never missed a show when they are in town but this time I was contemplating skipping their shows, as I was worried about leaving Lucky alone. Friends of mine who are fellow subdudes fans had been asking me "Are you going to the show?" and I kept saying "I don't know" because I wasn't sure I could go if Lucky wasn't feeling well.

After reading up on the meaning of squirrels, I decided it must be a sign that I SHOULD go, that I SHOULD have some fun to get my life back in balance. I am grateful the squirrel came along to give me a nudge, because I needed it. So, I'll be going to see the subdudes this week and I am really excited about it. If I have to get a babysitter to stay with Lucky, that's what I'll do although I think she would prefer to be in the car outside the venue because that's what we usually do. All the guys in the band know her and I think they would be disappointed if she wasn't there, since she's been going to the shows with me for years. I know Lucky wants me to have fun as well because if she's learned anything in the last 14 years, it's that the subdudes' music makes me very happy.

So, speaking of Lucky, she's doing pretty well at the moment. The week had it's challenges, as I discovered she has a yeast infection on her inner thighs and tummy and I have been trying to find holistic methods to help her heal. (I'm seeing some positive results already so I think we may be on the right track). And we had one particularly rough night where she was panting and seemed to be in distress and I was worried she was going to pass but after an hour or so of Reiki, she was able to fall back asleep and seemed much better in the morning. But all in all, I'd say she's still happy and still wants to be here. This is a picture of her at the park this week (still wearing her birthday scarf because we like to stretch our birthday celebrations out as long as possible.) She was watching the kids play on the playground and was obviously very happy to be there. I am trying to make sure we do things that bring her joy. It is important to me to keep honoring her so that I know if she passed that day, that it was a good day, a day filled with love and joy.

This is a picture I took of Lucky this week, using her new stuffed frog (a birthday gift) as a pillow. She hasn't used a stuffed toy as a pillow since she was a puppy and it warmed my heart to see her do it again after so many years and of course, seeing her sleeping so contently filled my heart with joy. She hasn't tried to rip its eyes or nose off, which is usually the first thing she does with a new stuffed toy. Instead, she seems content to just hang out with it. Maybe she wants him to be in good enough condition that I'll enjoy hanging out with him after she's gone. At any rate, I am blessed to have had another week with my precious girl.

If any of you reading this are interested in experiencing the magic of the subdudes' music, they'll be at Moe's Alley in Santa Cruz on Tuesday and Wednesday night this week. I promise you will not be disappointed. Their music has a way of lifting you up and filling your heart and soul. You won't be able to stand still and you may even feel 10 feet tall after the show. Now if that's not a ringing endorsement, I don't know what is!

And remember, keep an eye out for animals that cross your path - they could be trying to show you something.

Happy Birthday Lucky

Today is Lucky's 14th birthday. Thirteen months ago when we first discovered she had cancer, I didn't think she would live to see her 14th birthday. In the last couple months, I was even more unsure that she would make it to see this day. So, I am incredibly grateful that she made it to her 14th birthday. I'm pretty sure she enjoyed her birthday. We weren't able to do some of the things we have done in the past on her birthday, like going to the beach or to our favorite restaurant, Bill's, for a special breakfast, but we did our best to make it a special day. Lucky got to have watermelon for her lunch, one of her most favorite foods and then we went to the park.

We were fortunate enough that one of our favorite families, who we met at the park a few years ago, came to help Lucky celebrate her special day. Lucky opened her gift (a stuffed frog with a squeeker inside) and Siena, who is almost 3 brought some treats for Lucky to eat, since she didn't have a cake. Siena wanted to know what kind of birthday games we were going to play with Lucky. Her parents and I were at a loss, until her dad decided we could throw Lucky's new toy around like a hot-potatoe and that seemed to please Siena.

Lucky actually got to start celebrating her birthday yesterday when she accompanied me to a party. Sixteen years ago, my department got laid off from Apple. Our group was very close but we haven't seen each other much in the last 16 years, as our lives have taken us in different directions. We decided it was time for a reunion. Dan, who hosted the party, was kind enough to extend the invitation to Lucky as well and she happily hung out in the backyard with us while we all got caught up on each other's lives. She also enjoyed some chicken when it came off the grill, so she thought the evening was a smashing success. I was happy to have a chance to do something social, that included Lucky. As I mentioned before, I have been hesitant to accept invitations to go out lately, as it is difficult for me to leave Lucky alone. Being able to bring her along made the evening even sweeter for me.

She was so tired when we got home last night that she actually snored. It's not something I have heard her do before, so for the first 1/2 hour after we went to bed, I kept leaning over the bed to check on her and make sure she was alright. When I was finally convinced that she was indeed just snoring, I was finally able to fall asleep.

I don't know how much time we have left together. I know it's not long and that thought still makes my heart ache but I am continuing to try to just see each day as a gift and make the most of it. I can't even imagine what my life is going to be like without her. For the last 13.5 years, we have been inseparable. I take her with me almost everywhere I go and the thought of going somewhere without her in the car with me is something I can't quite wrap my mind around yet.

I had an interesting experience this week though, that confirmed my belief that animals (and people too) really do come and visit us from the spirit world. Last week, I wrote about a very special client of mine, Hanna, who passed on. This week, her mom decided she wanted a Reiki treatment to help her work through her grief. Before we got started, she and I both said we had wondered if Hanna would come and visit while I was there giving her mom a Reiki treatment.

About 5 minutes into the treatment, I sensed that Hanna was there. I opened my eyes and looked around the room but didn't see anything. Actually, that didn't surprise me because I don't "see" spirits but I kept sensing her presence, so in my mind I asked her if she would give me a sign that she was there. Just then, I felt a chill and all the hair stood up on my arms. I wasn't ready to believe it though, and came up with a few other explanations for why I might have gotten a chill, i.e. the sliding glass door was opened a bit and maybe it might have been wind blowing through the opened door. About 5 minutes later, I asked again if she would give me a sign and immediately, I got the chill again and the hair stood up on my arms. It made me tear up.

After the Reiki treatment was over, I asked Hanna's mom if she felt Hanna's presence and she said that she did. She also confessed that she second-guessed that feeling, wondering if she just WANTED to feel Hanna's presence and therefore, imagined it.

A few minutes later, a friend of hers, who has a 7 month old puppy named Mocha, came over to get some help from me on some "communication" issues that she and her puppy are having. We were in the middle of discussing some of their current challenges when all of the sudden, Mocha looked past me, then barked excitedly a few times and started to play bow. The three of us 2-legged folks all looked at each other, confused as to what was going on. I wasn't sure if Mocha was reacting to me, so I moved over to the left and again, Mocha barked and did a couple of play bows in the direction of where I HAD been sitting. We were stunned silent for a minute and then everyone broke out in big smiles. We were now SURE that Hanna was there.

It was such a heartwarming experience. I was so happy for Hanna's mom, that she got confirmation that her sweet girl was coming to visit her, even though she couldn't see her. I know it gave her a tremendous amount of comfort. And it helped me too, to see evidence that animals really do come back and visit their guardians. It makes it a little easier for me to think that when I am driving around in the car after Lucky has passed, that maybe she WILL still be in the car with me and maybe I won't feel so lonely.

If you have had an animal pass and you are wondering if they are coming to visit you, ask them to give you a sign. It might not be something you can "see" as I'm not sure animals can move something on the table or pull a toy out of the toy box, but maybe if you open your mind to other ways they might be able to show you they are there, you might be surprised by what you hear, smell, or feel.

How do you support the animal's guardian?

It is with a heavy heart that I share that a very special dog client of mine went to Heaven on Friday. It was her time.  Her guardian knew that, and I knew that, but it doesn't make it any easier.  It is always difficult when a loved one (whether they are 2-legged or 4-legged) has to leave us and we are faced with the void . . . the empty hole that seems like it could swallow us up if we let it. 

I dedicate this weeks blog to Hanna, who I had the honor of working with the last 10 months.  She was absolutely precious, as you can see here in this picture of her, snuggled up after a Reiki treatment.  She helped me see what Reiki could do, as evidenced the time her mom called me, telling me Hanna couldn't stand up, so I rushed over there to give her a Reiki treatment.  An hour later, Hanna got up and with her mom, they walked me to my car.  She responded amazingly well to the Reiki and continued to show me how powerful and healing the energy can be. I will always hold a very special place in my heart for Hanna.  Rest in peace, sweet girl.  Your presence in this world was definitely a beautiful gift to everyone who met you. 

I have been thinking about this sweet dog and her guardian a lot this week, in part because it hit close to home for me and also because I realize how difficult it is for people to know what to do or what to say when they interact with someone whose pet is about to leave this earth or whose pet has just left.  In honor of Hanna and her wonderful guardian, I thought it might be helpful to share some do's and don't, in case any of you are unsure of what to do when you encounter someone and their aging animal or interact with someone who has just lost their pet.

Before I get to that, here's a quick update on Lucky.  She is doing alright at the moment.  Her back legs are still not working at all, so I am using the sling almost full time to help her walk, whether it is inside or outside the house.  It creates a few challenges in getting around, as we always do better when we are moving in the same direction, it just doesn't always happen.  Her front end is still so strong, she can yank me just about anywhere she wants to go.  If she wants to go left, that's what she's going to do, regardless of what I might have had in mind.   :-)

She is not telling me she is ready to go yet, so I am just doing my best to make sure she is happy and comfortable every day.  

This week I decided to give her a bath, because she seems to like it when she is clean and smells good.  :-)  I bathed her outside on the grass, where she could lay down and enjoy the sunshine and she didn't have to worry about trying to stand up.  I spent quite a bit of time toweling her off afterwards because that is actually her favorite part. Here are a couple pictures of Lucky after her bath. It felt good to spend some quality time with her where we could laugh a bit and have some fun.  It is one of the things I have had a little difficulty with lately . . . making sure we are having fun . . . because most of the time, I feel pretty serious . . . coping with the stress of taking care of her, worrying about how much longer she'll be here, struggling on occasion to help her move when my own body hurts too much to participate fully, etc . . . all those things make it a little more challenging to be "light" so I was happy to have the chance to spend some stress-free time with her. 

So, how do you support someone whose pet is nearing the end of their life?  or whose pet has just passed? While it may not be easy, it is not impossible.  In fact, it is probably easier than you think.  Here are some do's and don't that might serve as a guide.  

- DO listen . . . a person who has an aging pet is filled with worries and questions.  Having someone who will just listen as you try to sort through all the decisions you are facing and the concerns you have can be a tremendous help.  You don't have to fix anything for them or solve anything . . . just listen.  

- DO be empathetic.  Empathy is extremely helpful.  If someone says, "I'm really worried about how I am going to cope with my pet's death," all you have to say is, "I can understand that." You don't have to give them a list of ways they can/should cope and you ought to avoid saying "Ya, I don't think you're going to be able to cope either."  Just acknowledge what they are telling you. If they say, "I'm so sad" just tell them you understand why.  DON'T tell them they shouldn't be sad, DON'T tell them they'll get over it.  Just tell them you understand.

- DON'T make negative comments about the animal (or the guardian for that matter).  It just isn't helpful.  Today, I had someone mention several times that Lucky looked really skinny.  At first I said, "It doesn't feel like it to me, when I am trying to lift her." but the person said it again, and again.  It just wasn't helpful.  I didn't want to discuss it or debate it.  I didn't see how pointing out her potential weight loss was helpful to me.  It's not like I'm not feeding her. Hanna's mom experienced some of that too when she and Hanna would be out for a walk. People would say "Oh, the poor thing, she look terrible."  Personally, I don't think a comment like that can do any good.  It only makes the guardian and the animal feel bad. 

Before you make a comment about someone's aging pet, ask yourself, "Will this comment be helpful to the guardian?" and if it the answer is "no", it's best not to say it.  On a similar note, comments about the guardian who is caring for the aging pet should follow the same rule. 

I had someone tell me a couple weeks ago that I looked awful.  Well, thank you very much.  I don't doubt that I did. There are nights where Lucky and I don't get much sleep and sometimes, I am physically and emotionally worn out but being told that I look awful doesn't really help inspire me to keep plugging along.  I don't expect people to lie either.  I don't want to be told I look FABULOUS when I know I look like I have been put through the wringer.  Again, if the comment isn't going to be helpful, it is best not to say anything, unless it is something like, "You look worn out, is there something I can do to help you?"

- DO offer to help the guardian, especially if it looks like they are struggling.  Last weekend, Lucky and I were leaving the park and I was trying to get us to the car.  I was holding her back end up with the sling, walking behind her, arm muscles shaking as I tried to hold her up high enough that her back toes didn't drag on the ground.  Lucky seemed confused about where the car was and was veering left and veering right, and I felt like the last person in line on a game of "crack the whip."  I didn't have a free hand to grab the leash to try and lead her in the direction of the car.  My friend David saw us, ran over and said "Would it help if I steered?"  "Yes!" I exclaimed . .  and he immediately grabbed the leash that had been draped over Lucky's back and led her to the car, while I continued to focus on holding her back end up. It was a small gesture and yet to me, it felt monumental.   I am amazed at how many people just stand and stare when someone is struggling with their pet.  If you aren't sure what would help, ASK!  All you have to say is, "How can I help?" 

**Note: You'll get a better response to a question that is open-ended, i.e. not a yes/no question. If you say "Do you want help?" it's easy for the person to say "No" often because they are afraid of inconveniencing anyone, so asking an open-ended question increases the chances that you'll find out what help they need.

- DO accept that things like potty accidents happen when animals are older.  DON'T make a big deal out of it.  I have several clients who are dealing with this issue right now.  They (and I) have developed a system to deal with it, towels, blankets and/or pee pads on the floor, a handy supply of clean towels to swap out wet ones when necessary, etc.  Saying "Your dog just peed! Eww, your dog just peed!" only adds to the stress.  You can simply say "How can I help?" or move out of the way so they can deal with it themselves.  

My friend Matthew had me over for dinner last week.  He decided we'd eat outside, so Lucky could join us, which really touched me.  Lately, I don't often accept invitations to go out because I'm not comfortable leaving Lucky alone for very long.  He put a blanket on the lawn so we could eat picnic style and I put Lucky on the lawn next to us.  We were having a nice time, eating and talking . . . and then Lucky had an accident.  He didn't get flustered or upset.  He just said, "I'll move the blanket down a few feet and the hose is right here when you are ready for it."  Ok, it helped that his cat threw up on the floor in the house when I first got there, so the expectation had already been set that we weren't stressing about our animals bodily functions, but it was so nice to have it be a non-issue.  He moved the blanket, I cleaned up Lucky, hosed the grass down and then we continued with our meal. 

- DO offer to lend a hand.  People who are caring for ailing pets are no different than people who are caring for ailing people.  They are tired, they are exhausted, they probably aren't sleeping very much or getting all the things done that they need to.  Offer a specific, such as "I'll come over for a couple hours this afternoon so you can do what you need to do." It doesn't matter whether what they need is to take a nap, or to run an errand, or something else.  What DOES matter is that you are willing to take over the care of their animal so they can have a break for a couple of hours.  

This is another time where HOW you ask the question is important.  If you say "Is there anything I can do?" the answer most of the time will be "No." It could be because the person doesn't want to burden anyone else or because they don't know what kind of help they need.  If you say "Let me know if I can help" you're pretty much guaranteed you won't hear anything from them because when you are run down, sleep deprived and emotionally raw, it's not easy to come up with a list of things people could do to help you.  It is much easier when someone just tells you what they would like to do to help you.  

- DON'T tell someone they should consider putting their pet down.  Assisted euthanasia is a serious decision and not one that guardians take lightly.  Believe me, they are already thinking about it, already grappling with the decision, and doing their best to listen to their animal and listen to themselves.  Having someone tell you what you should do is NOT helpful.  You can ask them questions if you want, such as "What is your gut telling you?" or other questions that tap into their thoughts/feelings/observations.  

When the time comes, know that the person is going to feel like someone ripped their heart out of their chest, regardless of how much they "knew it was time."  This is another time where the best thing you can do is just LISTEN and let the person cry if that's what they need to do.

Grieving is a process and I believe that tears are a very important part of that healing process. When someone is crying, there is no need to say anything.  Well, I had a boyfriend once who would just remind me to breath when I was crying really hard, and I loved him for that.  My tears never made him uncomfortable and I always felt safe crying in his arms.  But nothing really needs to be SAID.  It's a matter of making the person feel comfortable to let it all out, whether that means you hug them tighter, or offer them kleenex, the most important thing is that they feel safe to just cry if that's what they need to do.

- DON'T offer cliches . . . they really aren't helpful.  Being told "It will get easier in time" or "She's in a better place now" doesn't help you deal with the ache in your heart today.  DO say how sorry you are for their loss.  DO hug them.  DO let them know their pain and sadness is normal.  And then just listen . . . if they want to talk about their animal, share stories from the past, talk about how much they miss their pet or about their fears of getting through the next day and the next day without them, just listen and tell them you understand.

- Above all, let them know that they are not alone because for many people, a pet truly is their best friend.  I have many clients who are single (me included) so when they lose their pet, they can feel VERY alone.  DO tell them they can call you if they need some support or a shoulder to cry on.  And then DON'T wait for them to call.  If you haven't heard from them in a day or so, call them!  

- If a guardian who has lost their pet tells you they want to be left alone, DON'T believe them. Even if all you do is send an email or leave a voicemail message saying "I'm thinking about you" - it will be a tremendous help.  Hanna's mom experienced that this weekend.  She was trying to be brave and strong so she told people she would call them if she needed anything.  People took her seriously and left her alone . . . and she ended up feeling very alone.  DO let the person know you are there if they need you.  Knowing that people care can help you through some of the darkest times after the loss of a pet. 

- DO help the person celebrate their animal's life.  Ask questions about their pet . . . funniest story, best memory, craziest antic, etc.  As with people, it helps us heal when we can honor the life instead of focusing only on the death.  Offer to help create a scrapbook or some other momento of the pet's life, or find some other way to help the person focus on all the good memories.  

- DON'T suggest the person get another pet right away.  When a person is ready, they'll know it. There is nothing worse than being forced prematurely into another guardianship role, especially when you still have grieving and healing to do.  Getting a new dog or new cat doesn't always make things better.  It is best to leave that decision up to the person and let them work through the process on their own.  

I hope these tips are helpful.  It's never an easy time . . . for the person losing their pet or the people close to them who aren't sure what to do.  

I try to remind people that they shouldn't be afraid of their grief.  The amount of pain you feel is a representation of the depth of the love you had for your animal.  If you can see it that way, all the sadness can be less overwhelming and instead it can be a beautiful reminder of the love you shared. When we love that deeply, I believe it helps us grow emotionally and spiritually. We can end up being better versions of ourselves as a result of a strong, loving bond with an animal.  

Always remember that the animals that come into your life are a gift - a gift worth cherishing always - while they are here . . . and especially after they are gone.

Lucky's Journey

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my life with Lucky.  The last 13.5 years, have been filled with trial and triumphs.   She has had an amazing journey, overcoming obstacles that some people never thought she would overcome and showing more bravery and persistence than just about anyone I know.  Together, we have helped each other heal and grow and develop into the beings we were meant to be . . . together we've learned that we're both much stronger than we ever thought and we've learned the true meaning of friendship and love and trust.

This was originally going to be a special mid-week blog in honor of Lucky and her journey but it is taking me so long to do it, it looks like it is going to be "the" entry for the week.  Over the last couple of years, I have been working on a book about Lucky's life but have yet to get it finished and published.  I had always hoped I would get the book done while she was still here but since that may not happen, I thought the next best thing would be to share the short version on her story here.  Besides, it is more fun to write about Lucky's life while she is laying at my feet, rather than trying to do it after she has passed away, given that there's a good chance I'll be a sobbing mess for a while.  And since I finally figured out how to load pictures into my blog,  I thought it would be fun to tell her story with pictures.  

I first heard about Lucky in December of 1995.  I was watching the news and saw a story about puppies that had been found in a dumpster in Hunter's Point.  They were all dead except for two that were hanging on by a thread . . . Lucky and another dog named Sandy.  The dumpster was the location where they had been discarded once they were no longer of any use to the owner of the dog ring.  I couldn't sleep that night . . . in part because I couldn't wrap my mind around the idea that people would have such little regard for an animal's life and I shuttered to think about what those poor dogs had endured, and also because I had wanted a German Shepherd since I was a little girl and something told me that Lucky was the one I was supposed to have.  

When I called the shelter the next day, they told me that about 100 other people had already called wanting to adopt the dogs. They said that if the dogs survived their injuries, they would hold a lottery to determine who their new adopters would be.  Finally on January 12, 1996, Lucky was deemed well enough to be adopted and they held a lottery for her up at SF SPCA.  I guess there's no suspense here . . . I had the winning ticket and became Lucky's new guardian. They estimated Lucky's age at 6 months. (Sandy ended up being well enough to be adopted about a month later)

We were off to a rocky start, when two days after I adopted her, Lucky became very sick and I discovered she had Parvo.  One very long, scary week later, she was finally able to come back home with me.   In the beginning, I had to hand feed her every couple of hours, because her system was so raw from what she had been through. I think about that now, since I am hand feeding her again, and am reminded how sometimes things do come full circle. 

Once she was healthy enough to start venturing outside, I discovered that while Lucky's physical wounds had healed, her emotional wounds had not.  She was afraid of absolutely everything and her reactions were extreme.   If she saw (or heard) another dog, she would drop to the ground and throw up.  Not surprising really, given that for the first 6 months of her life, she was attacked by Pitbulls until she was presumed dead.  (And I have no disrespect for Pitbulls, I know those poor dogs were only doing what they were being told (commanded?) to do, so please don't think I am bad mouthing Pits, just stating the facts of Lucky's early life).

If she heard other sounds that scared her, she would try to dive

under the closest object she could find (table, chair, car, bench) or she would try to flee and she did that with such force, she could almost pull me off my feet.  Around the house, she hid in my closet, in the bathtub, under the coffee table or anywhere else she could find where she could be "safe" from the things are frightened her so much.  And the list of things she was afraid of was a mile long . . . anything plastic (tarps, wind breakers, dry cleaner bags, etc), anything metal (dog tags, keys, loose change, etc) and then a whole long list of random sights and sounds like the washer, the dryer, the coffee pot, kites, baseball bats, tennis rackets, etc. 

We worked hard in the early years trying to help Lucky overcome all of her fears.  It took a lot of baby steps, a lot of diligence and patience on both our parts but eventually, her fears began to diminish.  She was finally able to see and greet other dogs without getting sick.  One of her first friends was another German Shepherd named Tasha whom we used to meet at the park with her guardian Dave.  I can't tell you what a beautiful sight it was to finally see Lucky be comfortable around another dog.  

Unfortunately, all of Lucky's other fears kept her stomach churning and she threw up 8-10 times a week in the first couple of years.  This meant that her diet often consisted of rice and cottage cheese, which was supposed to be more gentle on her stomach. After countless vet visits to rule out stomach problems and other ailments that could cause all that vomiting, I finally began to realize the connection between mind and body . . . and as Lucky's list of fears dimished, so did the frequency of her upchucking.  At any rate, this was a frequent sight back in those days . . . Lucky walking around with rice stuck to her big beautiful black nose.  

Now, I think that's enough of the sad stuff.  Lucky's first couple of years were definitely difficult and challenging  . . . and often heart wrenching for me, as I had to witness the impact of what her early abuse had done to her emotionally and spiritually . . . but pretty soon, she seemed as normal as a dog who had never suffered the type of abuse she had endured.  Fortunately, she started to learn that life could be fun.  

Here is a picture of Lucky having her first convertible ride with my friend Marie and I.  As long as we stayed on surface streets, Lucky enjoyed the experience immensely.  (On the freeway, there was just way too much wind for those big ears of hers).  She liked the fact that she could look around, see into other cars, watch people walking down the street and smell absolutely everything.

Lucky also found that it was fun to join me and my friends on all of our outdoor activities.  Lucky was a "regular" at festivals, (until a lot of them stopped allowing dogs to attend) but she went to countless art and wine festivals, being the cultured dog that she is, and music events in the park.  Here she is at the Strawberry Festival in Los Gatos enjoying some music.

One of the other things Lucky discovered was how much fun it was to play in flip chart paper . . um, I mean, help her mom after a business trip.  :-)  Back when I was an Organizational Development consultant, I would often come home from a business trip with a stack of flip charts from the session I had facilitated.  I would lay them out on the floor so I could type up a summary for the client and Lucky took great pleasure in running across the room and skidding through them . . . and then roll around in them until she had crinkled every single piece of paper. 

That was her version of "helping" and I have to admit, it made the task more enjoyable because she would make me laugh the whole time I was trying to transcribe the notes.

Here is Lucky at our favorite "watering hole", the Black Watch in Los Gatos.  Lucky is enjoying a bowl of ice water, which the bartenders kindly offer to the 4-legged customers who come in. Over the years, Lucky spent a lot of time at The Watch, of course, not on Friday and Saturday nights when it is insanely busy but we'd go in on a weekend afternoon when it was quiet.  We would hang out and visit with friends or sometimes, my friend Marie and I would bring Lucky in there for a cool beverage after we had all gone running.  Marie and I didn't have to drink from a bowl though, they were kind enough to serve our "cool beverage" in a glass.  

Lucky has also always loved the water.  She had a medical condition that caused her to overheat, so a quick dunk in the pool (much to my neighbor's chagrin) would bring her temperature back down when need be.  Tennis balls were also a big part of playing in the water, whether it was dropping them in the swimming pool or in the toilet bowl at home.  (That one was only funny until the day I rushed into the house, in the verge of wetting my pant and found four tennis balls floating in the toilet).  After that, we instituted the "lid down" rule.

We had an annual tradition of going to the Santa Cruz mountains to cut down our Christmas tree.  Lucky loved wandering around the hillside, checking out all the smells and looking at the trees, although she mostly left the tree selection up to me.  Here she's watching our friend Doug to make sure the trees were being secured properly in the back of the truck because one year they weren't and trees started flying out of his truck on the way home.

Here is Lucky, laying on my bed.  Doesn't she look comfortable?  We had a rule about my bed . . . she wasn't allowed to lay on the pillows.  She almost always obeyed the rule . . . although there were a couple times that I got out of the shower and found she had wedged herself in the middle of ALL the pillows at the top of my bed, so that her body and that beautiful shedding hair was touching every single pillow available.  It's hard to get mad at times like that because she looked so cute!  I decided if she broke the rule to lay in the pillows, she must have had a good reason.   Here, she's showing me that she knows where the "line" is . . . the blue is my comforter, the white are the pillows and she seemed quite certain she was "following the rules."

Here is Lucky at the beach . . . one of her most favorite places in the world . . . so we made it a point to go as often as possible over the years, regardless of whether or not it was "beach weather." She loved to drop her ball in the water and then let the tide take it away.  She would watch it intently for a minute or so, then run after the ball and when she finally got to it . . . pounce on it!  Then she'd drop the ball again and see where the surf took it.  In this shot, she was trying to get a surfer to throw the ball for her but he walked right past her and into the water and I think she stared at the ball and then at him for a good couple of minutes before she realized his world didn't revolve around her.  haha

Lucky always enjoyed helping me in the garden.  One of her favorite games was to watch me closely as I was digging a hole to plant a flower and then when I turned the other way to grab the flower, she'd place a tennis ball in the hole.  Sometimes, after I was all done and back inside the house washing up, she'd pull some of the flowers back up.  One year, she kept pulling one particular zinnia out of the pot and placing it gently on the ground, next to the pot.  Artistic expression?  Anyway, here she is resting against one of the flower pots in the yard.  She had obviously worked hard in the yard that day and needed a nap. 

Did I mention how much Lucky has always loved tennis balls?  Here she is in the hall, having a rest after a lively game of "chase the tennis ball in the house" with her large collection of balls.  I used to sit on the couch and throw the balls down the hall towards the laundry room and she'd chase an entire bucket (which held about 80+ tennis balls).  Then she'd lay down and stare at me, waiting for me to refill the bucket and start the game over again.  One of her greatest loves in life has always been a tennis ball.  She loves to chase them, chew on them and de-fuzz them.  She used to fall asleep with them in her mouth, sometimes put them in her bowl while she was eating and as I mentioned above, she used to love to drop them in the toilet as well.  

One of Lucky's other favorite games when she was young was to roll a ball in between the stove and the refrigerator.  She would then lay on the floor, as she is doing here and bark at me for help. It required me having to get a spatula to slide into that small space to retrieve the ball.  I'd then walk out of the kitchen and within two minutes, she'd be barking again for "help" - because strangely, her ball had ended up in that small space again.  :-)  

One weekend, Lucky and I were visiting some friends up in Arnold for the weekend.  Us two-legged folks had been taking turns laying in the hammock and one night, we had gone inside to put our dinner dishes away when I heard a strange sound coming from the back deck.  We looked out the window and saw Lucky climbing into the hammock.  This is just one example of how Lucky has always acted more like a person than a dog, or at least she always seemed to have the attitude that if I could do it, then she should be able to do it as well.  Fortunately for me, she never tried driving the car, so at least she knew where her limits were. 

As I said before, Lucky seemed to think it was OK to do almost everything that I did, so I shouldn't have been surprised by this sight.   A bunch of my friends had come over to celebrate my birthday and I decided to leave the task of picking up empty beer cans for the morning. Well, after Lucky had breakfast that next morning, she went out into the backyard and a few minutes later, I found her holding this Coors light can between her paws, licking the top of it. I guess she had seen everyone at the party holding these cans and seeming to really enjoy themselves, so she wanted to see what all the fuss was about.  :-)  Since the can was empty, she wasn't able to get the 'full experience' but she did have fun imitating me and my friends.  

While Lucky managed to overcome about 98 of of 100 overwhelming fears, there were a couple items on that list of fears that she was never able to over come.  One of them was her fear of baseball bats.  It made going to the park difficult for us, since we couldn't seem to go to any park without running into kids playing baseball.  I searched and searched and finally found a park in our neighborhood that didn't have a baseball diamond.  It was when we started going to this park that I realized what an amazing connection Lucky had with children.  It wasn't long after we started going to this park that Lucky developed her own following . . . children that came to this park specifically to see Lucky.  We tried to stick to a firm schedule (3pm every day) so that her "friends" wouldn't miss her.  They would throw the ball for her and pet her and ask me all the important questions such as: What was Lucky's favorite food?  Where did Lucky sleep?  Did she have to be in bed by a certain time? Did she ever have a time out?  Did she ever have friends over for play dates?

It wasn't long before the kids started to treat Lucky like she was one of the gang and soon she was being invited to birthday parties.  I began bringing my camera to the park with us, so that I could take pictures of Lucky with the child whose birthday party she was going to go to.  (Parties in the park or in people's backyards were invitations we could accept).  Then we would enlarge and frame the picture for Lucky to give as her gift.  Pretty soon, every child at the park wanted to get their picture taken with Lucky, which thrilled her and I was happy to oblige. 

I'll never forget the time that one little girl, who was about 5 or 6 at the time, told me she was planning to invite Lucky to her birthday party.  I told her that was very sweet of her and then she told me that her party was going to be at the Build-A-Bear store in the mall.  Her mom and I tried to explain to her that Lucky probably wouldn't be able to attend her party, as dogs aren't allowed in the mall, but this little girl was not deterred.  She looked at her mom with the most serious face and said "But Mom, if you call them and explain who Lucky is, I know they'll say it's OK."  Needless to say, Lucky didn't go to that birthday party but she was still happy to know she had been invited. 

Here is Lucky with one of her most special friends.  We were at the park and it was winter time.  The sun was going down but she didn't want to leave Lucky.  Her aunt and I tried explaining that Lucky was going to get cold if she didn't go home so she went to the car to get a blanket for them.  She snuggled them both under the blanket and told us that now Lucky could stay longer.  They looked like they were at a slumber party and it was such a precious sight that her aunt and I decided to hang out in the cold and let them spend some more time together. 

Lucky is doing water therapy now.  Since she had hip and spine issues, the water is a wonderful way for Lucky to keep mobile.  Swimming helps keep her muscles strong and gives her a cardio workout as well.  I don't know what we'd do without water therapy.  I doubt Lucky would have done as well as she has this past year if she wasn't getting her water therapy every week.  Unlike most of the other dogs at water therapy who have "fun" in the water, chasing toys, etc, Lucky takes it very seriously.  She's in there to "do a job" (get her muscles feeling better) and she stays focused on the task at hand.  It's a very prominent trait of Lucky's, to be very determined.  She seems to think that if she is going to do something, she is going to give it everything she's got.  And that she does. 

Last January, I needed to have a picture of Lucky and I to submit for an article I wrote for Bay Woof.  A friend of mine offered to take some pictures of us and Lucky and I did our best to pose for some "magazine quality" photos.  It wasn't until we were done with the official picture taking part and started goofing around, that we got some of my favorite pictures.  I love this picture because it captures the essence of our relationship.

Besides Lucky, one of my other favorite things in this world is a band called the subdudes. I listen to them frequently and while I have 50-60 "favorite songs", there is one in particular that grabs my attention every time it comes on.  It's a song called "Don't Doubt It" and there is a line in the song that says "A family sits down to dinner and with folded hands they say, 'Give me another day, show me how to heal and learn how to feel.'"

I think about that song every night when I get into bed and each morning when I peer over the side of my bed and see Lucky sleeping peacefully on the floor next to me, I feel blessed . . . to have another day with my sweet girl . . . my best friend.  She has taught me more in 13.5 years that I ever thought possible, about life and myself and how I want to be in this world.  She has helped me heal in ways that I didn't even realize I needed to heal, and has touched my life in ways that would be impossible to recount.  

I think back to my intense belief as a child that I was supposed to have a German Shepherd and I wonder if Lucky and I didn't make some pact before we left the spirit world that we'd come together on earth so, with her help, I could learn and grow and heal.  I don't know how else to explain the "knowing" that I had as a little girl.  All I do know is, I am the luckiest person in the world to have been graced by her presence all these years.  I hope that I learned everything she came here to teach me.  This has, by far, been the most profound relationship I have ever had.  I know I am a better version of myself than I was before she came into my life and for that, I will be forever grateful to my precious girl.  I know I will do my best to honor her after she's gone by always striving to be the person she believes I am. 

It's all a matter of perspective

I have been thinking a lot about perspective lately, as Lucky and I have been faced with things we need to keep adjusting to.  Through these experiences, I am reminded of what a difference our perspective on something can make in our lives.  

I have always believed that words are very powerful and how we choose to label something can change how we feel about it (or ourselves).  I also always believed that how we choose to look at something can alter our experience from negative to positive.  Lately, I have seen many examples of this and it has served as a nice reminder of just how powerful our perspective on something can be.  

I have a friend who kept referring to herself as "selfish" when she was talking about choices she was making (i.e. saying no to an invitation because she wanted to have a night at home).  She kept saying "Maybe I'm just being selfish but . . . ".  I asked her if I could offer her a substitute word.  She laughed and said "Of course" because we've known each other a long time and she knows how I am.  :-)  I told her that from what I was hearing, it sounded more like she was being "protective of her time" rather than selfish and that I thought it might change how she felt about her choices if she viewed them as being protective of her time, rather than labeling herself as selfish.   She said she felt a shift immediately when she thought about my new word choice and said she'd try to stop labeling herself as selfish. 

Then there is a client of mine who obviously had been told by people that she babbled.  She would be trying to tell me something that she hadn't completely figured out yet and periodically, she would stop and apologize.  She would say, "I'm sorry, I'm babbling."  and then attempt to change the subject.  I finally said to her one night "It sounds to me like you are trying to process  your thoughts, it doesn't sound like babbling to me."  I asked her if she'd consider referring to her behavior as "processing" when she was trying to verbally sort something out.  I hated the idea that she would use a negative term like that about herself, especially when I saw how it affected her when she used the term.  She said she'd give it a try and in the beginning, she'd say "I'm sorry, I'm bab . . . processing."  

Over time, she got better about calling what she was doing "processing" and I encouraged her to stop apologizing because if it helped her to talk through things verbally, then didn't think she owed anyone an apology.  The shift in her energy is so evident to me when she uses the term "processing" (without the apology) - it feels to me like she is being kinder to herself, which is something I think we all need to do . . . be kinder to ourselves.

Then there was a sweet woman I know from water therapy whose dog whines a lot.  She frequently referred to her dog as "Poor Pitiful Pearl" (in a loving way of course) but one day I suggested to her that maybe her dog wasn't whining . . . that maybe she was singing.  She thought that was cute and said she'd try looking at it that way.  A couple weeks later I asked her if her dog was still "singing to her" and with a laugh she said "Yes, she sings all the time, but you know what? I am finding that I am enjoying it more"  We talked about the fact that even though it was the same behavior, somehow, labeling it as "singing" instead of "whining" made it more fun.  She even confessed that sometimes she would "sing" back.  

In the last 4-5 days, Lucky has been less interested in eating, which of course makes me concerned. She has always had a healthy appetite and I think I have always believed that if she was still interested in eating, she wasn't ready to leave.  I have found that if I hand feed her, she'll eat.  At first, I was thinking about it as a negative . . . Lucky won't eat unless I pick the food out of her bowl and hand it to her . . . and I realized that I was doing it with a lot of sadness.  The other day, I decided I would change my perspective about it.  I decided I would look at it as a loving gesture, an opportunity for us to connect and share an activity together.  Instead of being filled with worry, I was filled with love.  I actually look forward to feeding her breakfast and dinner now and plan accordingly, so we have enough time for me to sit on the floor with her, without any other distractions.  

Another example is the fact that when I lift Lucky out of the car, the pressure my arm puts on her bladder as I am lifting her out makes her tinkle . . . and that usually involves my legs and feet getting tinkled on.  Again, at first, it was stressing me out.  I had to wash down the floor of the garage, I had to clean my shoes, my legs (or change my pants) and it made me worry about her health.  I knew I had a choice about how I looked at it . . . and my first choice was to just wear shorts and flip-flops every day.  This is not a hardship for me at all, as I would wear short and flip-flops all year round if I could get away with it.  But now I call it my new "uniform" and it makes me happier to put on short and flip-flops every day.  And when the tinkling happens, I simply walk over to the garden hose and wash my legs and flip-flops.  Then I grab a water pitcher from the kitchen, fill it with water and toss it over the puddle on the garage floor.  The whole "clean up" activity takes only a matter of minutes and I have a surprisingly good attitude about it.  It's our "reality" right now and one that I am choosing to not get down about.  We've found a way to deal with it, without any additional stress.  In fact, the other day, I lifted her out of the car and she didn't tinkle on me.  I was almost disappointed, since I have gotten so used to it.  :-) 

We always have choices about how we look at something, or how we label it, just as we have a right to be happy and to feel good about ourselves.  I think sometimes we don't realize how much "choice" we really have . . . and how powerful those choices can be.  When we see things in the positive, our experience can be more positive.  Am I still scared that Lucky's time here with me is going to end soon?  If course I am.  But at least I am finding ways to see our final chapter in a way that makes us both happier.  

Who decides when "it's time"?

In the last couple of weeks, Lucky's back legs have not been working much at all.  It's been an adjustment for us but not one that has been terribly difficult.  I was already helping her walk with the sling so the only difference is that my arms are getting a way better work out than they were before, when Lucky was "sharing the load" so to speak.  Since I am doing all the work for her back end, it's requiring more arm strength for me and a little more coordination for the both of us, but we're making it work.  

I have been the recipient of comments during these last few weeks, some subtle, and some not so subtle, where people suggest maybe it's time to put her down.  My flippant and somewhat humorous response is: "If your mom couldn't walk, would you put her down?" but it has made me think a lot about this part of an animals journey and how we make the choice of when 'it's time."

I have always believed that the choice was up to the animal and our only job was to listen to them, to pay attention to what they were showing us.  Aside from the fact that Lucky needs my help to walk, she's perfectly normal in every other way.   She's still eating with gusto, she's still playing with toys, she's still waking me up in the morning by "singing" and she's still alert and happy.  Nothing in her behavior or demeanor is telling me that she is ready to go.  

But people still question my choice.  I have been pondering this issue for a while now, not only because of my own situation but also because I have friends and clients who are also dealing with pets who are aging and losing certain abilities.  I have realized that often when people decide to put their animal down, it's because THEY can't do it anymore.  I am not saying that is wrong, because we all have to decide what is right for us.  

I guess I look at aging more as part of the process of life. I am not afraid of it.  I have seen Lucky change in the last few years.  I have seen her unable to do things she used to be able to do and I learned a while back from a sweet Pug named Max that we have to just keep re-defining "normal."   What was normal before (chasing the tennis ball and running on the beach) has now been replaced with a new definition of normal and I know that definition will keep changing.  

These days, laying on the floor in the family room together while I read a book and hold her paw with my free hand is our new 'normal.'  It's not the same as running on the beach but it is just as sweet.  And now when we go to the park, instead of the kids throwing the ball for Lucky, they just sit around her and pet her and talk to her.  It's not the same as before, but it is no less touching to see Lucky light up in the presence of children.  

Several of my clients are dealing with these issues as well.  Potty accidents are becoming more frequent, as they have from time to time with Lucky.  Do you decide to put your animal down because they have a few accidents? or do you just keep a supply of towels handy?  I realize it's a personal choice.  If you can't handle the accidents, then maybe you make once choice.  If you decide that getting some pads to put down under them is an OK solution or having that extra supply of towels around, then you make another choice.  

I think about myself and how I would want to be treated when I get older and begin to lose my faculties.  I wouldn't want to be put down because I occasionally lost bladder control.  I would want to be treated with kindness and respect, regardless of what I could or couldn't do anymore.  And I have realized that that is what I am trying to do with Lucky.  I am trying to treat her with kindness and respect.  I am trying to honor her in this part of her life as much as I honored her in the previous 13 years.  I am trying to enjoy the time we have together and make it as fun for both of us as possible.  I am trying to not make a big deal about the changes we are going through, trying to help her see that we're still OK, we're still a team and letting her know I don't mind helping her with things she didn't used to need my help with. 

Most importantly, I am paying attention to her and I am listening.  When she's ready to go, I know she'll tell me, she'll show me.  I know I need to not let other people's opinions make me second guess myself or Lucky.  We've been together for thirteen and a half years and if anyone knows Lucky, it's me.  Just as my clients and friends know their animals better than anyone else.  We all have to make the decisions based on what is right for us and hopefully, what is right for our animals as well.  But if you try to tell me that I should put Lucky down because her back legs aren't working, I will tell you that Lucky isn't as concerned about it as you are.  :-) 

It is difficult in some moments?  Absolutely yes.  Last weekend when she woke me up in the middle of the night to let me know she needed to throw up, I tried to get her out of my bedroom and into the backyard.  My back, which has been a little taxed from all the extra physical requirements decided it wasn't going to cooperate with us and it gave out on me.  Sitting on the floor of my bedroom, I knew I would never be able to get both of us up and out to the backyard in time, so I grabbed one of the towels I have on hand and put it in front of her.  She threw up on the towel.  It wasn't the end of the world.  Of course, in a moment of weakness and overload, it didn't stop me from crying and telling her I was sorry I couldn't get her out in the yard but she understood.  I put the towel in the laundry room to deal with in the morning and once I got her back on her bed, we both went back to sleep.  

On the plus side, I have better arms muscles than I have ever had before and I don't even need to go to the gym.  I look at this time as just a part of our journey - the part where I get to give to her - to let her know how much I truly appreciate all she has done for me over the years.  I look at it as an honor.  We're partners in this world, at this time.  I would do anything for her, just as I know she would do anything for me.  I will continue to try to be the person she believes I am . . . strong, capable, resilient, loving and kind.  And when she tells me it is time for her to go, at least I will know that I honored her to her last day.

Animals listening and communicating

I have had the honor this week of witnessing the variety of ways our animals try to communicate with us as well as their ability to hear what we say and respond.  Sometimes, our animals communicate so subtly that we can miss the message if we aren't paying close enough attention. Sometimes, we misinterpret the message they are trying to send us by seeing things through our own eyes and our own fears.  And sometimes, we don't trust that they can hear the things we say and respond.  In the hopes of helping you better "hear" your animals, I am going to share a few of the things I witnessed this week.

There was one animal who wouldn't eat.  Her guardian was really concerned about her, fearing the worst, that she had a major health issue.  I wasn't sensing any major health issue with her cat so I began asking the guardian some questions.  I asked her how long the lack of eating had been going on and what had changed around their house at that time.  At first she couldn't think of anything but as we continued to talk about it, the puzzle pieces began falling into place . . . her cat had stopped eating the same week she had switched to a new cat food.  

I suggested to her that her cat was letting her know that she did NOT like the new food she purchased and asked if she could get a can of the food she used to eat and give it a try.  She called me about an hour after I had left her house to report that she had picked up a can of the food she used to buy and her cat had devoured almost the entire bowl in one sitting.  I am sure animals often wish they could speak, so they could say things like "Yuck, I don't like this food, can I have something else?"  Instead, they are forced to wait for us to correctly interpret what they are showing us.

Then there was an older dog that I saw this week who was recently diagnosed with cancer.  Her parents were troubled by the fact that she walked around the house all the time, making a loop through the kitchen, then through the family room and then back through the kitchen again. They were concerned that this constant walking around was a sign she was in pain.  

When I asked her about it, she gave me a picture of her laying in her bed sleeping and her parents standing over her, trying to tell if she was still breathing.  I asked her parents if they often checked on her when she was sleeping.  They both looked at each other with a knowing smile and then confessed that they frequently stand over her in a panic, worried that she has passed away and they confessed they did it multiple times a day.  

I explained to them that their sweet girl was trying to let them know she was still alive and well by making the loop around and around the house.   She thought that if they saw her walking around and around, they wouldn't worry about her so much. Unfortunately, that wasn't the way they interpreted it, but fortunately, they now know that's what she is trying to show them.  We also asked her parents if they would give her more "space" when she is sleeping and they promised to do their best.  This is another case where I am sure the dog wished she could talk because she would have probably said "Hey, I love you and all but can you two let me sleep?"

And finally, there was a guardian who was really concerned that her cat no longer meowed.  Her cat is older and is having a lot of health issues.  She was worried the lack of meowing was a sign that her cat was unhappy or very sick.  We talked about it while I was giving Reiki to her cat, so that her cat could hear our conversation.  

The guardian confessed that the constant meowing used to get on her nerves a bit and she had told her cat more than once that she wished she didn't "talk" so much.   She said that now she really missed the sound of her cat's voice.  I checked in with her cat and asked her if she had heard everything her mom had said, and asked if she would be willing to start "talking" again because her mom really missed it.  I also told her that her mom promised she would never complain again about her "talking."

About ten minutes later, the Reiki treatment was done and the cat went down the hall to get a drink of water and use the litter box.  About a minute after she had walked down the hall, we heard her meowing.  Her mom's eyes got really big and she excitedly went down the hall to hear the meowing from a closer distance.  She was in shock that her cat had understood what we had asked of her and that she had honored the request so immediately.  From the smile on her face, I could see just how much she had missed hearing her cat talk.

The next day, I got an email from her asking a question about something we had discussed and at the end of the email she wrote "BTW, she's still talking . . . I don't think she has stopped since you left last night."   I teased her when I wrote back and reminded her that she had better honor her promise to never complain about it.  :-)  

So, I hope you'll take a moment today to stop and observe your animal.  Is there anything you think they are trying to tell you?  Any message that you may have missed? or misinterpreted? and if there is something you want from you animal, don't be shy about asking them.  If they can do what you've asked (and want to), they're always willing to oblige.