My mother

On Sunday, April 17th, I got a call from my dad, saying I needed to come to the hospital to see my mother, as her health had taken a turn for the worse.

On the drive to the hospital, I was hanging onto my optimism . . . after all, we had lived through health scares with my mom my entire life and every time, she managed to bounce back, even when the doctors didn't think it was possible, so I hoped that this time it would be no different.

The thing is, my mom had Lupus, a disease in which the body's immune system attacks its own cells. It cannot be cured, so Lupus patients go back and forth between flare ups and remissions, and during flare ups, my mom would be so fatigued, she could barely function, her joints and muscles would ache severely and when it got bad, various organs would start to shut down and she would be hospitalized.

When I was a little girl, her flare ups would scare the heck out of me and I spent a lot of my early life on edge, believing that any day, she could leave us . . . but I think over time, I began to think she was invincible because time and again, she would be gravely ill and then miraculously get better and go back to being her fun-loving self again.

When I walked into her room last Sunday, something told me that this time it was different. Tears welled up in my eyes as soon as I saw her and at first, I couldn't breath. My optimism began slipping away, as a reality I didn't want to face began to set in. This time, I feared she wasn't going to pull through and I felt so sad for her, and what was happening to her body. She kept saying she wanted her mother, and each time, I felt an ache deep in my heart. I knew it meant she knew that this time it was worse than any time before as well.

Over the years, our relationship was often strained. I think my mom and I probably spent too much time focusing on how we were different. sometimes in funny ways, like how she used to joke that she must have brought the wrong baby home from the hospital, since I didn't like to shop, or wear make up or change my hair style the way she did. Many of our disagreements and hurts over the years were centered on how we were different . . . but as I stood next to her bed, all I could think about was how much we were alike and how much I loved her.

It was a long week, as the family sat in her hospital room day and night, hoping and praying to see any sign of improvement, hoping the doctors would finally figure out how to reverse what was happening to her . . . and I found myself thinking about all the parts of me that came from my mom. It felt good to focus on who she was, and all the ways she had a positive impact on me and the person I have become.

I certainly got my love of animals from her. My mom loved all animals . . . and she loved them deeply. We always had dogs when we were growing up and she adopted stray cats as well. My dad was allergic to cats, so they weren't indoor cats, but she knitted beds for them and fed them and talked to them when she was outside tending to her garden. She supported every animal organization there was . . . even when my parents were having financial difficulty, my mom found a way to still support all her favorite animal organizations.

My love of gardening came from my mom as well . . . from her, I learned how therapeutic it could be to sit in the yard and pull weeds, and how much joy flowers could bring you, when you took the time to appreciate them.

My mom was also one of the friendliest people in the world. She could talk to anyone and had such an ease when it came to conversing with people. I know I learned to do that from her. She frequently struck up conversations with strangers, became friends with the check out clerks at Safeway and the sales people at her favorite clothing stores. Everywhere we went, people knew her and adored her.

Unfortunately, by Thursday, we were forced to accept the fact that there was nothing else the doctors could do for her. One by one, her organs were shutting down and this time, she wasn't going to be able to fight through it, the way she had so many times before. On Friday, April 22nd, my mother passed away. It was incredibly painful and yet it also felt like a huge honor to be there with her, as she left this world.

Amidst the grief, I find comfort in knowing that she is now at peace and free of pain. I smile when I think that she is now with her mother, who she had really been wanting to see, and that there was probably a long line of animal friends waiting to greet her when she arrived.

Healing for Humans

Even though almost half of my clients are human, I don't often write about them in my blog. I think it's because my human healing sessions tend to be deeply personal and I don't think my clients would feel very comfortable with me sharing too much about their sessions.

Still though, my human clients have great insights into their lives and their own healing journeys, they have amazing breakthroughs and tangible results, so I have been trying to find a way to write about the sessions with my human clients, without revealing too much, and at the same time, sharing enough that others can benefit.

I realized the other day that there was a theme running through many of my recent human sessions, and I decided that writing about the theme might be the right way to share some information.

This recent theme is around beliefs . . . the concept that whatever we believe, we manifest in our lives, and even though we may not like what is showing up in our lives, it is always tied to a belief we hold. It may not be a conscious belief, but it is a belief none the less. I have seen again and again that if we want to have a different result in life, we need to figure out what belief brought us the result we don't like and then determine what we want to believe instead.

For instance, if you keep having the experience of people taking advantage of your kindness, then there's a pretty good chance you hold a belief that people can and will take advantage of your kindness. Sometimes, when I bring this up with my clients, they feel like they are stuck with only two choices . . . continue to be nice and have people take advantage of them, or stop being kind to others and be someone they don't want to be. I refer to this as "black and white" thinking and when we only see things in black and white, we often feel like we have no where to go.

Part of the work I do with people is to help them see more options . . . assist them in moving away from "black and white" thinking, so they can see the possibilities. I help them understand what the underlying belief is that is creating unwanted experiences in their lives, help them release the belief if they don't think it serves them any longer and then help them form a new belief, one that will better serve them.

I frequently ask my clients, "What would you like to believe instead?" and this can be a difficult question to answer. I think part of the reason is that we are programmed to believe, on some level, that we can't have what we want or that we don't have any control over what comes into our lives. I work with my clients to help them see that they do deserve to have what they want, and help them feel empowered to make changes in their lives. I work with them to help them release that old programming, so that it is easier to answer the question, "What would you like to believe instead?"

In this case, my client eventually said, "I want to believe that people will appreciate my kindness, and be kind in return." With the assistance of the energy, we allowed the body to release the old belief and then embrace the new belief. Many people think it sounds too easy to work, but I have seen proof again and again that it really is that easy.

Through my work with human clients, we have identified and released beliefs such as, "You can't make money doing what you really love to do," "Men are weak and need to be taken care of" and "Other people's needs are more important than mine" and we replaced those old beliefs with new beliefs, that will help them manifest what they really would prefer to experience in life.

If you look at your own life, are you experiencing things that don't please you? Do you feel that people don't really listen to you? Maybe you are holding a belief that what you have to say isn't important. Do you find that your relationships are difficult and take a lot of energy out of you?" Maybe you are holding a belief that relationships aren't easy and require a lot of work. If so, I'll ask you . . . "What would you like to believe instead?"

Over the years, I have witnessed this enough to form a pretty strong opinion that what shows up in our lives is tied to the beliefs we hold, (often on an unconscious level). Our thoughts and beliefs are incredibly powerful, and yet, so are we. At any time, we can choose to believe something different . . . and then we can have a different experience.

The Dog and the Deer

Every once in a while, you come across something that is too good to not pass along, whether it's a story, a video, a photograph or a great quote. When something touches you that much, you can't help but want others to have the same positive experience . . . and this is one of those times.

Recently, a good friend of mine sent me a video she found on the internet. She and I share an intense love of animals, and have since we were in elementary school, so I had a feeling I was going to enjoy the video . . . but I have to say, out of all the animal videos I have seen, this is by far one of my most favorites.

Every time I even think about the video, it makes me smile. I am not sure why this one touched me so much. It could be because it is moving to see animals of different species have such an amazing bond with one another or it could be that it is just soul-touching to see such a beautiful friendship between two beings, one that is filled with sheer delights as well as harmony.

The video is of a deer and a dog who have an undeniable friendship. They chase each other and frolic in the grass and they lay together on the dog's bed, looking absolutely content to be sharing the space with one another. Their affection for one another is so evident, I don't think anyone could question the connection these two animals have with one another.

Here is a link to the video . . . I hope you enjoy it as much as I have.

http://www.dogwork.com/ddsff4/

click here

Getting "signs"

Last fall, my very dear friend Sue lost her beloved dog Butch. Since then, she has been navigating her way through the grieving process . . . dealing with each wave of sadness as it rolled in . . . and trying to find a way to get used to life without her precious dog by her side.

About a month ago, she started talking about her growing desire to adopt another dog. She was back and forth, over whether it was the right time and after spending hours pouring over dog rescue sites and shelter sites, she was also concerned that she wouldn't know which dog was the right one, even if it was the right time. I told her I was sure she would "know" when the right dog came along and suggested she keep an eye out for "signs" that would point her in the right direction.

Last weekend, I got on the computer and found an email from another client of mine. She had recently started volunteering for an animal rescue organization and they were putting the word out that they had six three-month old puppies whom they were looking for homes for. When I looked at the pictures, I saw the puppies were black lab mixes, and I immediately thought of Sue because Butch was a black lab mix. I thought maybe it was a "sign" and then after scrolling down to read the rest of the email, I saw the name of the person you needed to submit your application to . . . and it just happened to be Lucky's former dog sitter. The hair stood up on my arms and I decided to forward the email to Sue.

Sue decided it was a "sign," filled out the application and submitted it the next morning. Twenty four hours later, after being contacted by the rescue group, she was off to meet two of the remaining available puppies and about an hour after that, she was on her way home with a new puppy . . . she named him Mingus, after one of her favorite jazz musicians, Charles Mingus.

I went over the next night to meet her new little friend and the joy he brought with him to her house was absolutely contagious. We couldn't stop smiling the whole evening. Since he is being treated for worms right now, his tummy was really unhappy, so I gave him a little reiki treatment. Sue and I were shocked to see that he immediately slipped into a little trance, just the way Butch used to. We were both overcome with the feeling that this was meant to be.

Sue was still in a bit of a quandary though . . . several of her friends had suggested she get two dogs, so they could play with one another and not be lonely when she was at work. While she thought it was a good idea in some ways, she wasn't sure she was ready for TWO dogs, especially since she hadn't slept much since Mingus had arrived. She was going back and forth over her options, weighing the pros and cons, etc. The one puppy from Mingus' litter that remained was a boy and he was really skittish. She had been thinking about getting one boy and one girl, but all the girls in his litter had already been spoken for. Once again, I suggested that she trust the Universe. I told her I believed that if it was meant to be, it would come together easily, that she wouldn't have to work so hard to figure out what to do.

The next morning, the rescue group called her back and told her the adoption of one of the girl puppies had fallen through and they wanted to know if she would like to adopt her too. Sue took it as the "sign" we were talking about the night before and later that night, she was the proud mom of yet another puppy. She named her Nina, after another of her favorite jazz musicians, Nina Simone.

Nina and Mingus were thrilled to be united (after an initial bout of confusion) and have been playing non-stop with each other since Nina's arrival. I went over there this weekend to meet Nina and get another puppy-fix. There's nothing like a puppy to make you smile from your toes all the way to the top of your head and when you multiply that by two . . . well . . . Sue and I couldn't stop smiling. Even though Sue has only had a minimal amount of sleep in the last week, she hasn't been this happy since Butch passed away. As her friend, I have to say, it was really nice to see her so happy again.

Before I left, Sue asked me a question that touched me deeply . . . she asked me if I would be Mingus and Nina's god mother. It was a huge honor to be asked and of course, I said "Yes?" So, now I have two darling little god-children. I look forward to looking out for them over the years and providing whatever love and guidance they may need along the way.

Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance

Back in January, I wrote about my dog client, Kaya, who had been receiving reiki along with her chemotherapy. I had been thrilled to see that Kaya never experienced any of the usual side effects of chemotherapy and her mom and I were sure it was the reiki that had made that possible. It made me wish that more people would try alternative treatments, not only for their animals, but for themselves as well, if they were faced with cancer.

The morning after I posted that blog, I got an email from a woman named Jackie at the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, (www.mesothelioma.com) home asking me if I would like to be listed on their website as a reiki resource, in their alternative treatments section. I couldn't believe it. The timing was not something I could ignore. I put the idea out there to the Universe and in less than 24 hours, I got a response. It was exciting to think there was a big organization out there who understood the important role alternative treatments can play in our health and well-being.

I exchanged a few emails with her and checked out their website as well, to learn more about the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance, and I have to say, I was really impressed. This is an organization that is doing everything they can to help people with a cancer diagnosis (and while their focus is on mesothelioma, I believe almost everything on their site could apply to anyone with any type of cancer). I know many people who have received a cancer diagnosis and it often felt like the equivalent to a death sentence . . . but on this particular website, it is clear that their intention is for people to get WELL. Everything about it felt really positive.

When I got on the website, I first clicked on their alternative treatments tab to see what they recommended (www.mesothelioma.com/treatment/alternative) alternative and found thirty-three alternative options! Most of them are treatments that I am very familiar with and I couldn't help but feel excited that there was an organization out there who really understands the benefits of alternative treatments. They seemed to be communicating the very same thing that I was writing about in December . . . that often times, a combination of eastern and western medicine can be a powerful and effective approach to dealing with cancer, that we don't have to go all western or all eastern.

Through my email exchanges with Jackie, I found out that animals can get mesothelioma as well. (www.mesothelioma.com/asbestos-cancer/pets-animals) pets which surprised me. While most animals don't have a "job" where they are exposed to asbestos, very often they are the pets of people who have been exposed. If the asbestos is on their guardians clothes when they come home from work, there's a chance that pets can end up getting mesothelioma. What was encouraging is that they believe animals would benefit from all the same treatment options they offer humans and encourage animal guardians to explore their recommended resources.

I was so impressed with the work they are doing, that I told Jackie I was going to write about their organization in my blog. Knowing how scary and overwhelming a cancer diagnosis can be, it was comforting to think there was an organization out there that was trying to collect all the information a person might need, all in one place. The fact that the website is well organized and easy to navigate made me even more interested in putting the word out about their website. One page on their website summarizes all the resources a person might need to explore, from doctors, to hospitals, to alternative treatments to experimental treatments. (www.mesothelioma.com/community/) community

While I don't wish for anyone (human or animal) to get a cancer diagnosis, it is nice to know there are resources out there that can assist people in finding the help they need, and also nice to know that alternative treatments are becoming more widely recognized as a viable approach to treating cancer. I encourage you to look at their website and maybe bookmark a few of these pages, in case you ever come across someone who is needing some help. With all this information in one place, it could save someone hours and hours of their own research.

Animal Communication

People often assume that all animals are very eager to talk up a storm when given the opportunity to visit with an animal communicator but in actuality, communicating with animals can be as complex as communicating with people because there are so many similarities.

I am sure you know people who always have something to say and are very eager to share what's on their mind . . . and I am sure you know people who are quiet and would rather listen to others than share what they are thinking. Animals are the exact same way.

You probably know people who are very trusting and have no issue at all revealing personal information, even after they have only just met someone . . . and you probably also know people who need to build up a certain level of trust before they will reveal anything personal. Animals are the exact same way.

As an animal communicator, it is important to me that I always honor the animal I am working with and their particular method of communicating. It doesn't do me any good to try to force an animal to communicate if they aren't ready, just as it doesn't do me any good to not pay attention to an animal that has a lot to say. :-)

Often times, an animal will be shy about communicating with me, if they aren't sure how their guardian feels about it (after all, their loyalty is to their guardian, not to me) so I often ask the guardians to speak with their animals before an appointment with me and let them know it's ok to share information with me. That helps most of the time, but in some cases, animals will still need a little time to develop some trust with me, before they will open up too much.

The other funny thing about communicating with animals is that they don't use all the same words we do, or have all the same understanding of things that we do. It is important to keep that in mind, and to try to explain things from their perspective, in terms that they will understand.

It brings to mind a funny memory of my sweet girl, Lucky. Many years ago, we went away for the weekend with some friends of mine. It was one of the first times I remember being on a trip where other women were in the house with us and fortunately for me, one of the other women was also an animal communicator (which was helpful to me at the time because sometimes I couldn't "hear" Lucky as well as I could "hear" other animals).

It was the first morning after our trip had begun and we were all taking showers. I took a shower first, then one of the other gals took a shower. When she came out of the bathroom, Lucky was standing in the hall, looking at her oddly and then she barked at her a couple of times. She yelled to me in the kitchen and said, "Why is Lucky barking at me?" and I honestly didn't have a clue. I could feel concern coming from Lucky, but I couldn't pick up anything else.

Just then, the third gal (the other animal communicator) walked out of the bedroom and said, "Lucky wants to know why you are wearing her mom's hat." It took me a minute to understand what that meant, but once I did, we all laughed hysterically (and then I quickly explained to Lucky that we weren't laughing AT her, we were laughing with her).

The "hat" Lucky was referring to was the towel wrapped around my friends head. I realized that Lucky had never seen anyone but me come out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around their head, because she and I lived alone. It made perfect sense from her perspective. :-) I explained to her that most women wrap a towel around their head when they get out of the shower, that it wasn't just me, and that she would be seeing all of us with towels on our heads through out the weekend. After that, Lucky was fine and she never barked at anyone again when they were donning the post-shower "hat."

So, remember, if you are trying to communicate with your pets yourself, or working with an animal communicator, your animals each have their own "style" as well . . . they may be talkative, they may be more hesitant to speak up, or they may need more time to get comfortable with the idea of sharing what's on their mind. The important thing is to honor their method of communicating. The one thing I can tell you for sure, is that what an animal chooses to share is always valuable, and always worth hearing.

The Mystery Spot

Last weekend I went to the Mystery Spot in the Santa Cruz mountains. It had been eighteen years since I had been there, and that was long before I was working with energy the way I am now, so I was eager to go and see what I would experience this time.

For those of you not familiar with the Mystery Spot, it consists of a circular area (about 150 feet) in the middle of the redwoods, explained as a gravitational anomaly. It was discovered in 1939 by a group of surveyors and opened to the public in 1940.

In this specific area, there are variations in gravity, perspective and height that no one has ever been able to explain. Some speculate that cones of metal were secretly brought here and buried in the earth as a guidance system for spacecraft. Some think that it is in fact a spacecraft itself, buried deep within the ground. Other theories include carbon dioxide permeating from the earth, a hole in the ozone layer, a magma vortex, the highest dielectric biocosmic radiation known anywhere in the world or radiesthesia. Whatever the cause is, it remains a mystery. (Source: www.mysteryspot.com)

Aside from the odd things that you can see up there (things roll uphill, you can lean forward farther than you ever imagined possible, without falling over, people look taller or shorter depending on where they stand, etc), there is also something that I found interesting . . . birds never fly over the area (within that 150 foot space), animals are never seen there, not even insects. Given that I believe animals know a lot of things we don't, or that they sense things to a greater magnitude that we do, I was extra curious to experience the Mystery Spot again and see what I was able to pick up intuitively, about the place in general and more specifically, about why the animals stay away.

Much to my disappointment, from the moment we stepped into the "spot," it was as if my intuition wouldn't work at all. It was such a strange experience. I felt woozy and nauseous, my legs felt like they weighed 200 lbs. each and I could barely walk without holding onto something. Still, I was fascinated by the experience and tried to pay attention to everything our guide was telling us. I wanted to take it all in but I was having trouble concentrating. I wanted to see what I could pick up myself, but I felt like I was not in control of my body most of the time nor connected to my intuition.

There were so many things I wanted to ask our tour guide, questions I had come up with before we got there, such as; Why aren't animals allowed up there? What do they think would happen to an animal if they were at the Mystery Spot? What were their theories on why birds and other animals avoided the area? etc. but once we were there, my brain wouldn't work well enough to remember that I had even planned on asking questions.

At one point, I attempted to participate in one of the "activities" in cabin, in the center of the Mystery Spot. In this particular spot, if you grabbed ahold of the bar in a door jamb, your body would float toward the side wall of the cabin, without any effort on your part at all. After stumbling over to the door jamb and grabbing ahold of the bar, I lifted myself up off the ground, and just as they said it would, the lower half of my body floated at an angle. The weird thing was that I could barely hold onto the bar. My arms felt so weak, it felt as if my legs literally DID weigh 200 lbs. apiece. My arms were shaking so much, I could barely hold on, which was so odd to me because I am in pretty good shape and can do a chin up without much effort and this was far easier than a chin up.

After the "photo op" I stumbled over to our guide and managed to ask one question, (still not remembering at that point that I had lots of other questions I wanted to ask). I said, "Why do you think my arms were so weak when I tried to do that?" and his response was, "Your body must not like the energy here." I can't say I disagreed. Clearly, I was experiencing the "energy" of the place far more intensely than everyone else there, and it wasn't a good experience, from the standpoint that I don't enjoy feeling that woozy, heavy, weak and uncoordinated.

Even though I was really affected by the energy and left without asking any of my questions, I was still glad that I went. It was certainly an interesting experience. While I don't completely understand why animals stay away (and why pets aren't allowed in), I wouldn't be surprised if the answer was as simple as . . . the animals feel the same way I did, or worse, when they are at the Mystery Spot.

For now, I guess this will remain a "mystery" . . . but it is still such a fascinating place. If you haven't experienced it yourself, I recommend going. If nothing else, it will certainly give you a lot to think about.